But how many lentils did you serve?

Which is why I greet the dog with a curt, yet friendly, “Dog” and a nod. If they’ve been an especially good dog, I offer them a firm handshake and no less than three shakes...but no more than five because I’m not a psychopath.

The way this study was conducted would be like if I went on gettyimages, looked at 250 randomly selected pictures of people working in office environments and published “Study shows 90% of Americans LOVE work!”.

Everything’s absurdly cheap in a country that loves slavery.

It’s actually about ethics in sixth grade track sports reporting.

Anyone who wants to diss this because of the age difference can take a flying fuck. Life is hard and if you find love and everyone’s a consenting adult, I say FUCK YEAH!

The only time I’ve ever been to Beautique was when I was with my ex and we were still swingers, in order to meet the tackiest couple we encountered in the year we were together. The man was exactly the kind of beefy, oily, overly-groomed type that is endemic to this sort of place, and his wife was a high-school…

Does anyone else think that Ariana has become SIGNIFICANTLY more insufferable by the day? I know she was supposed to be some sort of resident, “cool girl, laid back, IDGAF” chick but I find her to be SO irksome. She and Tom’s inflated senses of self-importance are absolutely staggering.

It think the name was Simon?

What in the hell does it take for Thorgy to win a challenge? I mean, really. It’s like she kills/does very well, gets told as much and... it goes to Bob. I don’t get it.

I watched 13 hours of VR on Saturday because my jerk friends got me hooked on it. Let me just say, Tom could’ve used some coke that time it took him a week and a half to incorrectly put together an Ikea coffee table.

people with giant golf umbrellas should be beaten with them.

staph infection

I mean I think Christoph Walz is sexy and Ryan Gosling is kinda overrated and I was still like... him???? I mean at least post a picture of him in his youth just to make it fair:

COUNTERPOINT:

I have with an Ex and FYI it feels exactly like these:

SCHEANA IS THE WORST PERSON ALIVE!!!!!!!

To me, the way the whole butt thing started was kinda homophobic and calling it a “white guy thing” was R & G trying to imply that a black guy would not touch another guy’s butt/black guys are not gay.

Excited for when Abby makes Nia play OJ and murders the other girls! (It’s gonna happen sooner or later, right?)