My kid won a Pulitzer prize this year and she's a dolphin without any hands to write with so it's all the more impressive. So proud of my little baby. Oh she's 2 btw and doesn't even go to school... because she's a dolphin.

"Nobody gives a shit about your boner" was my favorite Jezebel-ism of 2014, I really hope "nobody gives a shit about your children" becomes a thing in 2015.

I'm so sorry for you. They sound wretched.

Oh man I'd forgotten about the Lena Dunham truther pics. That was kind of a low moment for my favorite procrastination site.

Moskowitz does not offer vaccines for his patients because, he says, they are creating a population with chronically weak immune systems.

weren't actually built, launched into the air, destroyed, and then crashed into Washington DC?

The PS1 was introduced 21 years ago. I think that's old enough to be legit old. In fact, we're farther away from the launch of the PS1 than the PS1 launch was away from the launch of the Atari 2600.

I actually got pissed at that tweet. While I know Cosby's movie work sucks balls, Apatow's acting like he's fucking Orson Welles or something. Fuck him.

You know what? Despite my disgust for Cosby, FUCK Judd Apatow. At least Cosby TRIED to put more than one person of color in his work and didn't write female characters that were just vaginas that got in a bros way.

Judd Apatow still sucks

I'm loving all the buzz about this...

Seriously stop asking the question if you're just going to nail it with the header image :P

She adopts kid, kid does not turn into werewolf.

Strange, but I can't really judge. Every year my president pardons a turkey from being killed and eaten for Thanksgiving, before going on to eat a... different turkey. So.

So because you've never seen one, they don't exist? Werewolf erasure rears its ugly head.

It was a response to your take that "the world is such a terrifying place for children and parents." That's something of a "fear culture" sentiment that is perpetuated by much of the media. Our children are, in many ways, far safer now than they've ever been. It's hardly constructive for children and parents to feel…

We might laugh, but I've never seen an Argentinian werewolf so it's clearly working.

he becomes a werewolf after his 13th birthday? So Werewolf Bar Mitzvah spoke the truth?