I've been looking for a representative Gawker comment, and I think this one really fits the bill:

You had me at "piffle."

Captain Jean-Luc Picard: You will assist us to assimilate this team. You are Borg. You will assist us.

Don't think this makes up for Leitch's Jamboroo poop omission. That damage is DONE.

Sure, yuk it up now if you must, but when Republicans realize that Tebow's their OBVIOUS nominee, it's gonna be a Constitutional shitstorm...

Great news! Works just fine.

I felt like this won the thing for me:

It's way, way more fun to play by editing other people's comments, I think. For instance:

Why is he apologizing? My four-year old fell right to sleep realizing that one of his uncles was hanging out late with us. Thanks, Jaws, come back and curse it up a little next week.

War Walter Mosley, and war Gerorge Pelecanos; Romie, I am out.

I just briefly got excited about the espn3.com broadcast of the HR Derby... until the audio synced up. I burned that Chrome Tab before Berman could utter a second guttural syllable. I could swear I have developed some kind of aural antibodies that create inflammation and pain at the mere sound of the guy's voice.…

Obviously, an expat is not defined merely by his chosen vocation; rather by the age and gender of the children he fucks. Silly.

Nice to see that KD finally found a point guard that would get him the damn ball.

How dare you try and insert your dirty facts into my opinion! Capitalism was invented and sanctified by Jesus in the Bible, right before Satan created unions! Those is the only facts I need!

Hmmm.... life lessons from DFW... can't say I'm totally sold on that concept.

...and so the dark power of Simmons continued to coalesce and manifest itself...

You forgot ketchup.

Pit Bull versus Golden Retriever — what's a practice kill doing in the middle of the brackets?

While we're at it, maybe we could come up with a nickname for Jeff Foster. Like a superhero, for instance, only exactly the opposite of that.

Wow, Erin Andrews hasn't been that exposed since... Wait. No. Too easy.