Ok so she’s Titania? Actually she might be an interesting choice for a proper version of a Midsummer Nights Dream.

I know she’s very polarizing and troubled, but I always wished her acting career took off. She’s got a real, raw, and unnerving talent as you can see in People vs Larry Flynt. She really is an untapped resource as a character actress. Maybe this role will get her back out there.

Oh, good, I’ve always wanted to insert my penis into math.

Came here to post “get a nice wide drill bit, drill into canteloupe, sand the edges of the hole down, microwave it, stop to consider what you are doing, go out for a walk and sit down under a tree, and think for a real fucking long time about the choices you’ve made that led you to this very moment”

As a penis haver, if I’m in the shower and need a quick testicular release, that bar of soap is far too complicated. Instead I reach for conditioner and proceed to rough up the suspect. Conditioner stays slick and it makes my penis smell nice afterward, and my wife won’t ask why there’s a fucking hole in a goddamned…

From my coworker Jordan Sargent:

As a former actress, I can tell you why I wanted to be in the industry. Actually, let me reword that: I didn’t want to be “in the industry,” I simply wanted to act. Like any other creative person, I wanted to practice my art and be paid for it. I started saying I wanted to be an actress when I was very, very small. I…

I was also sick in bed when I read the original Barbara Bush post which led to pretty crazy hallucinations/dreams of making out with an ex while BB looked at us disapprovingly while crouched on top of my armoire.

This is good reporting

I’m just here for the library porn.

That is also a sexy swiffer and a comic relief blowtorch.

She was able to fit people into meat pies so...

No, a kettle goes on the fire/heat. A tea pot is the receptacle for the water that has been heated in the kettle, and where the brewing of the tea happens. In my non-expert opinion. FIGHT ME.

The ultimate proof the Disney movie worked is that Beast looked weirder as a human at the end of the film than as a beast during the film. I imagine that will not be the same for this film.

Haha this comment has me imagining Cathy sitting Belle down to be like “girl, look...these brooding, volatile guys are great for a first love, but they’re not marriage material! Find a nice, stable neighbor! What about that Gaston?!”

Jerry Orbach is the only Lumière to me. And now I have a case of the sads.

I’ve never enjoyed the show more than after reading the alt. theory that Jeffery is dead, and the ‘viewer’ is her caregiver to whom she’s narrating her previously thrilling life amidst teaching her wonderful recipes. She cooks to remember her lost love, the guests are a farce. 💔

Oh man, a Nike Air Hart would be badass (spelling differences aside).

Jeez. That’s like having Goodyear “Princess Grace” steel-belted radials.

Aww, I love Amelia Bedelia.