This sounds like the 1st step of bestiality 

My mom still has that pitcher....

This makes perfect sense

I grew up and went to elementary school in a small rural Iowa town. Fuckers taught us how to line dance when boot scootin’ boogie came out (I’m an old). They made us all do the damn dance at the school’s music show.

Mine’s only $160 and I have two rooms in my house dedicated to growing weed.

Tim Brown and Jerry Rice thinking the raiders threw the game makes Al’s case even more humorous to me.

That picture you used is misleading. Check out how much bigger the ‘kid’ is now.

It’s not white yet. :)

No - But it absorbs the juices. I advise a shower afterwards or you’ll be smelling it all day.

Beard in the zipper is the worst. My wife came and checked on me yesterday when I was shoveling snow after the yell I let out when I zipped up too fast. She thought I fell on the ice.

Haha, no. Beards are close tho. I can’t grow the hair on top like that.

Yup! Mine’s so long now it’s reaching my belly button.

I live in the States and work for a British company. I use Brit terms and slang every day whilst conversing with co-workers. I agree, when you’re immersed you tend to change a bit for whatever reason.

That’s always been my take on the mouth wash too.

He was embarrassed by shitting at the Depot. So he finish shopping at Lowes.

Why is it stupid that she’s using the spelling and grammar of the country she now lives in?

I used to listen to the radio in the shower every morning before work. That habit stopped after the 3rd day in a row of having to hop out mid-shower to change the fucking channel, only to have the song play on another station within minutes of returning to the shower. Now I shower in silence.

Well, and consuming a fuck ton of milk and cookies

Are they going to show the games on Fox News? I can see them getting Tomi Lahren & Hannity for the pre-game hype show droning on and on about how their players STAND for the anthem and only KNELL at the cross.

60 wouldn’t do much for me. My tolerance it too high from my daily use. I get what you’re saying though.