not orange enough

I’d list the guy who got busted with a briefcase of pharmaceuticals 1st.

Interesting. Haven’t had that combo. May need to try it!

Did you talk in 3rd person too? That may have been the deal breaker.

“As many modern humans do, I use my smartphone on the shitter (holding it well out of potential splashdown range). At my workplace, the T.P. dispenser is on my left, so I need both hands (tear off with my left, wipe with my dominant right), which requires me to put my phone down. Since it’s hard to jam the phone into…

“Need help on this. Classic school lunch here in Nebraska is chili and cinnamon rolls. I’ve heard from people in Iowa and South Dakota who had the same hot lunch goodness. But if anyone from anywhere else in the US hears of this combo they act like it’s totally crazy. So 1) Is chili and cinnamon roll common 2) your…

Looks like NBA PR’s been watching old Alicia Silverstone movies. This is like out of the movie Crush.

Was she turned on by the meat farts?

“If furniture and appliances could talk, which would have the most blackmail material? I’m thinking bed, toilet, fridge, DVR. The computer is exempt because it can basically already blackmail us with browser history data.”

Sadder than this guy at Man U?

Romo starts week 8, by quarter 3 of week 8 Romo will be injured again.

Oh shit, someone called the logo police!

I heard it was just Bear Grylls trying to sell shit

He might be on to something. Gotze’s been shit since he turned into a walking boner.

Now I know what “Zlatan-style” means

I’m the asshole who’s an asshole to the assholes. I’m fully aware and take pleasure in it.

I thought it was Bill Hicks

My mom did the same thing in the late 80's. She still uses the damn thing.

The donkey delusion is strong in this one.

Used that one to describe frat houses in college.