During the offseason, he recounts his IRS days. The stories he could tell you about the Imelda Marcos cocaine parties.

He's such a fan of Liverpool that he was added to the subs bench when Fernando Torres picks up his usual injury after 20 minutes.

Big deal. I've seen Sasha Grey put in the same position Massaquoi's in many times.

Frank Caliendo, Dane Cook & Conan O'Brien. Only one of these people shouldn't be chucked into a incinerator. Guess which one?

This is almost as entertaining as the time H. Ross Perot took out a full page ad in the New York Post, just so he could ask black people why they hate him.

Lazy SOB, couldn't maintain an erection except while lying on his back

"And this is how I would have sex with Lauren Jackson"

Bad news: Chiefs lost

You know Alex Smith, I've seen Steve Bono play, and I must say.....you are EXACTLY like Steve Bono.

@FiddlingWhileJimRomeBurns: Special shoutout to the back judge who threw that bullshit PI flag on Brandon Flowers.

Great pass blocking, Chiefs O-Line.

To the line judge who called the pass interference flag on Brandon Flowers, even though Andre Johnson clearly pushed off to make the catch: FUCK YOU AND YOUR SOUL.

Dwayne Bowe just caught his 2nd TD pass today.

The Browns O-Line to Colt McCoy is what Merlot is to Paul Giamatti in Sideways: a hinderence.

@vodkanaut: Redzone. Currently showing Ravens/Pats.

I know it's been said a thousand times here, but I'll say it anyway: thank God for NFL Redzone.

So Matt Millen is doing the Texas-Nebraska game. I expect Taylor Martinez to have his worse game of the season, and Garrett Gilbert will tear his ACL. That's the power of Matt Milen.

I'm assuming Jeff Franceour has already flyed out twice, as is his method in big games.

@Hatey McLife: +1

Sadly , their animation video of the Fall of Saigon was not amusing.