It is incredible that the USA can produce a team capable of dominating a sport on a global stage, beating up on evil socialist European countries, and uniting a decent cross section of America behind them and the fucking president still picks a fight with them.

They were unapologetically American. Brash and confident. They came in as the favorite and they didn’t try to downplay that fact with an “Aww shucks we’re just happy to be here and we’re gonna try real hard.” attitude. They owned that and then danced on the graves of anybody who dared doubt them. And it was fucking…

“OOooohhhhhh, Fuck Donald Truuuu-uump”

Yes, I am aware of that. I am also aware that you can only have one in the lineup at a time and Jimenez and Abreu frequently look like that is their best position on the diamond. Not to mention the fact that people have predicted Zach Collins is a DH in training and if Jake Burger ever goes a week without blowing out…

I’d make a joke about how being at GR Field/The Cell/Comiskey brings out the white trash in Cubs fans too, but I’ve been around Wrigley after Cubs games and see plenty of this shit without having to travel down 35th & Shields...

Unless things have changed since the early 2000s, the guy with the restraints is an actual Chicago cop. Which explains his struggle to put a white person in handcuffs.

How are the Cardinals doing this year? 

the Double Eagle is referencing a current conflict between two nations that hate each other and is something that can induce violence. The tea thing, not so much.

It’s a horrible word and I try to only deploy it when the target is an Englishman (and something of a cunt). In case you missed it, his Twitter history shed’s some light on his cuntdom.

You thought America culturally appropriated The Beatles??? The band most famous for stealing black american music??? and... man your head is gonna explode if yall ever get google over there.

You can’t leave out the previous three centuries where England racked up some pretty impressive genocides.

*Ahem*

British culture is Shakespeare plays about Danish kings and Italian teenagers.

Colonialism and, by extension, IPAs?

Or like how in America bananas are seen as nourishment while in England they are viewed as aerial projectiles to be hurled at black players?

Ah yes, the country that declares the Men’s World Cup trophy (created by a Frenchman and awarded by an organization based in Switzerland) is “coming home” anytime they string a couple of victories together is schooling us on arrogance. Got it.

Gotta say, I agree with Neville here. The USMNT would never display such arrogance. Heck, they didn’t visit ANY hotels in Russia during the 2018 World Cup!

“Nation that hasn’t won jack since 1966 wonders what it’s like”

(ahem) Kawhatch