See also every band or singer who has ever toured:

To circumvent advertisers putting junk mail in your mailbox that they didn’t pay postage to send. They can toss it on your steps or in your yard, even rubberband it to your doorknob, but they can’t put it in your mailbox, where theoretically, you’d be less apt to dismiss it.

He’s essentially calling a war widow a liar. And bragging about speaking “without hesitation.” 

You know, I’ve written thank-you notes to bosses that were reprehensible, abusive people. Because they were horrible people. Because they were immune to any sort of recourse in a shitty, fucked-up corporate system that rewarded them for their worst traits, and they signed off on my reviews.

That’s because it’s easier and more convenient to install outdoor lights while it’s still tolerably warm out.

“I knew he was ... a womanizer.”

A lot of her clothing is of the “encased in fondant” variety. Like, it’s seamless, and body-hugging, but for all its latex references, its got a sort of sexless Easter candy vibe. Also, it’s the sort of attire that is often employed by someone who really likes their jewelry or accessories to command attention, only…

“I like how the last 3 days have just been lighter and lighter iterations of purple.”

Ehh, he’s just making sure the trains run on time.

From her most recent shoot. I’m not lying, this was intentionally published.

And she’s undermining whatever success and awareness the players gain with their protest, by suggesting that the meaning isn’t evident, or their actions lack a unified purpose.

You no longer interest me, even a little bit.

• Dan Buettner said, “The happiest place in America is Boulder, CO.”

Precisely. I feel like New Megyn is just the fancy cheese on a mouse trap. I don’t need fancy cheese that urgently. I will wait until I go to the store for my fancy cheese. Plus, I’ve seen cartoons.

But produced on equipment that once was in contact with nuts.

It makes me someone with autofill, who knows someone named Nicole Wallace.

David Cross is a dick.