Area Woman Confused by Headline: Locals Respond, say “God, Tina.”

Paragraph breaks. Please.

I usually just said I had a stomach ache. But I guess that’s why he was “The Great Communicator.”

Still, a form of vulgar cultural appropriation.

Your anti-rain privilege disgusts me. Do you know how many people are DYING for lack of rain? Your pruny elitism is APPALLING. FEEL SHAME.

That seems very right, somehow.

Sarah Palin aspires to the level of children’s show actor. I’m thinking Henrietta Pussycat, for all the sense she makes.

Thanks for shitting on the joke. I bet you didn’t raise your hand in grade school, you leaned forward, grunting, and waved it.

One wishes, desperately.

Too late. It’s become an industry category. It’s likely never going away.

It’s kinda marsupialish. I can see her climbing eucalyptus trees with a distinct advantage.

Or why the boyfrint he has to sit one row behind? Why these is?

Hugh Hefner? Bob Guccione? Joe Francis?

Or, you know, stay home. Forever.

From The Illustrated Lord of the Flies:

WHAT WERE THEY DOING SITTING AROUND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY ANYHOW