fittingly, “bleph” is the exact sound I made when I imagined getting the fat sucked out of my eye sockets.

Wait, though; is that the actual doll? Or a model dressed as one? Because that’s some seriously Uncanny Valley stuff going on.

The media (including sites like this one) are eating up Zika like every other disease (can’t wait for another Spanish Flu!!), but the fact is that there’s a lot of variables at play here, and the CDC and WHO have yet to fully determine cause and effect.

Well, the dead-eyed faces of banal evil. There you are. That poor child.

This makes so much sense. And if people like this are unwilling to recognize informal financial help from their parents as real and actual help—the kind that counts—it’s no wonder that they’re also unwilling to notice and acknowledge informal racism (and other forms of oppression) as real. You know, the kind of…

...And this is the part where I propose the 100% federal estate tax.

I’m currently 33 and am completely independent save the $50 birthday check I get each year. At least I thought I was, until a few days ago when my father suggested kicking me off the family cell phone plan and I reacted as though he had asked me to sell my kidney.

What? This is outrageous. I’m white. I’m a millennial. My parents owe me thousands!

You can have many heroes. Look at Lord of the Rings, soo soo many heroes and you don’t even have to choose just one.

Rather than being upset at her, Trump supporters should be praising her and following her example. Maybe if more of them started reading, and learning about the issues being discussed in this campaign, they'd realize how wrongheaded the Donald's ideas are.

I don’t know why this doesn’t have more stars

My theory: He just really wanted to talk about rubbing himself in cow shit in public.

It reads like my... I mean someone's KFC fanfic.

Yep, it’s called taxis, uber or friend. You just pulled Pinkham’s law. Congrats.

We have people claiming that loudly butt-trumpeting in a crowded dining room is perfectly acceptable. I keep thinking nothing could surprise me...

This is by far the most baffling example of Pinkham’s Law I’ve yet seen. How many people are just gleefully letting the poots fly in the middle of crowded restaurants?!

Reading this post, I would never have guessed that people would be flying to the comments to defend that fart. I clearly have much to learn about internet commenting.

I dunno. You might get some Pinkham’s Law Advocate claiming that a margarita in the eyeballs is refreshing.