Sarah Jeong is one of the best writers on the internet, and every person complaining about her tweets should have a court appointed guardian because they are too stupid to oversee their own affairs.

The last one. I’m very proud of it.

Thanks! That was me!

Yay! I made the cut again. Does this count as being a published author?

“You know, the Colonel also spoke of the better ingredients in which our Aryan brothers were made from, not like those oth.....*dial tone*”

“I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed man" would be acceptable.

> “Those comments are totally inappropriate,” she added. “The president should not be talking about the investigation at all.”

Only selling the regional chips in THEIR markets, rather than being like “taste of the (region)“ and mixed around is dumb. I’m in Texas and I want those goddamn Old Bay chips. I can get queso any time I want.

This is wheelie sad news.

No, but it certainly contradicts his bullshit claims that ISIS is no longer a threat to anyone thanks to him. Or wait, was that North Korea? Much like Donnie Bitch Tits, I can’t keep his lies straight.

I saw a movie that starts like this.

If he doesn’t hear it already, he’s going to hear a ton of it from his friends moving forward about how hot his mom is.

It’s true. When you are in the military (and not just pretending to support it) you’re taught that when you’re in uniform you should face the flag and salute and if you’re not in uniform you’re supposed to stand at attention, meaning arms at your side. If any of those chicken hawks had ever been in the actual military…

In addition to removing his hat does he know that you’re supposed to stand with your hands at your sides for the anthem? Putting your hand over your heart is for the Pledge of Allegiance.

I’m a go ahead and throw this spicy take out there:  It’s not about the anthem and everybody knows it.

Much better to ingest and absorb the killer, competitive instinct of the bovine.

A lot of people have weird hangups about food. Cut the man some slacks.

Why do people always make this comment every single year for multiple bad franchises? Do you not want to read the dysfunction? I do. Your article pitch sounds boring.

And you’re obviously not real good at actually thinking things through, so let me help. A) my father’s father died when I was nine, his mom when I was 27. The first time he took the money that was supposed to be a college fund for me and blew it. With his mom, I asked for one thing (the family china) and he sold it,…

“That reminds me, what ever happened to Wes Welker?”