I have a Dolly Parton license plate. I though y’all should know that.

Susan Lucia is a whole other ball game. She is like a beautiful diamond.

I bet y’all are super close. This right here is why celebrities get away with murder. People are blinded by fame and can’t wait to tell people about it.

Your ten minute meeting and ice cream payoff will never convince me that this dope isn’t the worst.

I’m not make a comment about his reasons, just the facts. I voted for that little elf twice and I’m a true blue democrat. I’m hoping we have a real Democrat running for his seat next year.

The Republican Governor has been pushing for Medicare expansion though unsuccessfully.

You read it wrong.

It would be cheaper to get a tummy tuck than have a kid. This lady had her muscles split. That is not for self-esteem. It is not the same thing. Jesus, it is impossible for some people to not make things about them.

So, I’m white and I was wondering if someone could help me make this all about me.

But if she doesn’t how will her friends know how cute and clever she is? Is she supposed to just ignore the hours spend looking up “pi party” on Pintrest?

You have to buy party supplies! This is what we are fighting for. Thank you for being so brave.

I live in Tennessee and I ate Brie last week. This whole EU thing makes total sense to me. 

At least we aren’t supposed to stick these rocks up our vaginas. I’m looking at you, goop.

71F in Nashville. What the hell.

This “old” tried to do something nice for his or her new coworkers? What a monster.

Last night I had a dream that I met Hillary and she asked me for my number so we could hang out later. It’s like we are in that movie Unbreakable and you are Samuel L. Jackson.

That is one thing I would never say.

I just came here to say the same thing. It seems like once I month I have to remind some fools that all chaps are assless and that koalas have chlamydia.

I hope you are right.