This is sad, but diet frosted lemonade? If you're going to be put to death...shouldn't you just be like, fuck it, I'll just have the calories?

Wait, it isn’t?

I was so angry at you for making me tear up, then I was like “Damn my eyes were dry and this feels good.”

I thought you were saying that Jimmy Fallon outed himself and I read the article and I was disappoint.

We are long lost siblings. *pats shoulder awkwardly, having never learned affection.*

A story on this topic in my local paper mentioned a guy who left his son-in-law a rope and a sincere wish that he hang himself with it.

Samesies.

I can’t WAIT.

clearly you’ve never heard of legoland ;)

i’ll just leave this here:

Although it sounds like the result of some freaked-out parent being annoying, these sunburns are legitimately terrible.

I laughed.

Because it’s verboten or because those aren’t choices that you want to make for yourself? There’s a difference.

Cocaine? No.

I feel like Taylor Swift is now one of the most defensive people on the planet. she insured her legs, got parody videos taken down from youtube, she bought domain names like taylorswift.porn a, removed all her music from spotify and wrote a open letter to apple and is trying to copyright “this sick beat”

lol @ her super concentrated face.