Hooray for you.

Oh good. It’s not just me.

They’re not abnormally long, there’s no fucking room for average sized human beings.

Damn useful. Now, where’s the button I can push to legally murder the fucking sociopaths that insist on reclining the seat back into my poor knee caps?

And let’s not forget the man-whore that is Chris Christie. You can practically hear him begging for Trump’s table scraps with that look on his face.

“Murderslay?”

This is why I love TurboTax. It’s paid for itself every freaking year we’ve used it (since 1997).

Done both and they have the same result, but the toaster oven is a “set it and forget” task, which makes it +1 in my book.

Best way to reheat foods like pizza. Takes a little longer, but it’s so worth it.

I like the idea, but I’m afraid it would leave a shrimp taste on the iron that would carry over to the next time I’m making “regulation” waffles. I guess I just need a second iron. ;)

Hey, he’s a fungi!

Agreed. Phase 3 just keeps you from getting laid off (usually). Otherwise, I’ve been locked out of a number of promotions because they could live without me in my current position.

Wait! A professional sports team abusing the dumb fucks that shell out huge wads of cash to watch their rigged, pointless, and masturbatory efforts?

We use “Out of Milk” exactly the same way. It’s awesome and our list is always in sync and never left at home.

He’s a good guy, but yeah, not the brightest. He finally got a vasectomy while his wife was pregnant with his #7 (her third).

I don’t know. I got a buddy that all he has to do is sneeze around a woman and he can get her pregnant. 7 kids with 3 different women. The last one was born a few months ago and he’s 44. His oldest is a freshman...in college.

Totally. If it’s not a physical issue, you can be retrained to talk properly (or lose a native accent/dialect).

It was suggested and ignored until their teachers suggested the same. Not sure if they’re actually going though.

I have to use Outlook 2010 for work. Fucking blows.

From personal experience, I can yes. My kids spoke earlier and more articulately than their peers (or their nieces and nephews). My wife and I refused to talk like brain-damaged idiots. We would speak slower than normal when helping our kids understand a new word or phrase, but I never “dumbed down” my speech for my…