I was just about to ask, where have all the cowboys gone?

There’s even a Mars stop on the Metra. I’ve been here two months now (woo, Wheeling! Wheeling? I’m not sure yet how people feel about Wheeling) and knew about it.

Hmm...I’ve tried front to back, and I’ve tried back to front...I don’t think I’m bold enough to try side-to-side.

Step 1: Put Amazon Echo in a Wilson
Step 2: Change Echo trigger name to Wilson
Step 3: Don’t get hit by a car
Step 4: PROFIT

Message: A
Style: A
Effort: A
Technique: [poop emoji]

Still, I loved it. +1 ball.

Not according to Alan (apologies for the quality):

Vicodin, Dilaudid, Xanax, Ambien and THC

I thought the days of Tiger hitting the greens were over.

Sadly, even an ACTUAL NFL GM admitting drafting a kicker early was dumb isn’t going to stop that jackass in your fantasy league from drafting Janikowski in Round 4. YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE A TIGHT END YET WHAT ARE YOU DOING

...subject of controversy.”

This should be a Rosetta Stone ad, because damn do I want to only listen to this announcer from now on. Excellent work sir.

Tebow: [steps into RH batter’s box]

You’re a monster.

So many gains he keeps them on a chain! SWOLECAT

Doug Pederson, who always looks like he’s about to offer you a hamburger off his grill.

Every part of every thing you have owned or will own, and every ingredient or piece of machinery needed to make every part of every thing you have owned or will own, ad infinitum, has been or will be inside a trailer just like that. You would (but really shouldn’t) be shocked what ships by the truckload.

If this is a sport I want Feinberg’s article on farming spliced.