Oooooo...pretty!

I'm sorry but that is just coolness personified.

This just in: I have received lewd texts from Brett Favre.

I just got turned on by a cartoon.

THAT...was awesome!

Dear girls who read these books—give a nerd like me a ring.

Dear Monica—please have all my Italian/German children. Thanks.

@♥AntiSocialSocialite♥: You and me, both!

There he is...my first big non-gay man-crush.

@LucilleMcGillicuddy: Best Trek film to date; followed closely by the rebooted Trek.

@Newestname: RE:1 & 2 had some pretty damned spotty controls. Still loved 'em both.

Poor, poor hummingbird.

Ugh. Star magazine—what a joke. Please get better, Michael.

@Tony Kaye: Oh, that's definitely more hip.

@SirBrau: I'm just sensitive when it's kitties or doggies. Or kids.

@LucilleMcGillicuddy: You dare question Khan?!

Hey, he looks good. I'm glad the guy's even alive.

@cheesesandwich: Oh, relax—you'll live longer. We're not making fun of you, personally.

Millar is vastly overrated.

I could have done without the kitty, thanks.