My partner and I have been quarantined in our 1-bedroom apartment since mid-March. We have a cat and no yard and are both working from home. My desk is in the bedroom and his is in the living/dining room. I have NEGATIVE sympathy for people living in mansions. 

they are such kids in this I can’t even dislike them for playing house and probably trying to create some idea of what they think being normal is.

Lol, is this a serious question? The insane sexual chemistry between younger men and middle-aged women aside, who says she’s always looking for a long-term relationship? And you’re questioning her intelligence for it? Jfc, I could have sworn I was on Jezebel.

I did some research to confirm that Milla Jovovitch was indeed bangin’ in that blue shade.

Some of the biggest fights I had with my mother started with how dark my lipstick shade was. I still don’t know why she was so offended. The rest of me was Gap khakis and a 90s bob. It’s that voice I hear before I ask my own daughter if she needs mascara or a gloss. She’s fine.

Birds chirping constantly. I also swear I’ve heard owls hooting. Are there even owls in New York City? I do now know.

The smile is very Jack Nicholson “Joker.” Creepy. I’m 39 and I do a sprinkle of botox now and then when I can afford it, but I’m grateful I can’t afford any more. As an avowed feminist I’m still susceptible to being body-conscious and could easily be seduced into trying to look young. But I rarely think these…

Yes, came here to post that she was unrecognizable because she is smiling in the “natural” picture. It makes me sad for some reason ... Maybe because it’s like a glimpse of what she would be without the Kardashian baggage. Like she looks like a typical teenager and you wonder if she has ever hade the joy of just being…

People are weird about you quitting drinking for the same reason they’re weird about vegans. At some level they feel ashamed their own choices so they try to mock yours.

People’s reaction to my sobriety (507days!) have ranged from being nosey to being downright pissed off about it. Like I cant stop drinking if I’m not an alcoholic or haven’t hit rock bottom. But remember, people’s reaction to your sobriety is 100% about their relationship with alcohol, not yours.

I had A BEER this weekend- ONE- and woke up feeling like I chugged straight tequila a la Lizzo.

I should quit drinking. Not because I drink too much, I almost never drink, but because after having a baby I’m such a lightweight that even one glass of wine gives me a hangover. I can’t hang with the cool kids anymore without wanting to die the next day.

This will be the first TI record I skip. For me it's been downhill since Innerspeaker. Not saying I blanket dislike everything after, but consistency has been dwindling.

I’m not worried because I am confident that the American people will never elect a loathsome, racist, clueless, obnoxious New York billionaire to be President.

I’m definitely interested in giving it a listen when I have time but after Currents I’m not holding my breath.  Lonerism and Innerspeaker were both much better.

...or even the satisfaction of slamming closed a heavy-duty flip phone. Almost as nice.

Still missing the most important aspect of the old rotary phones: Young people will never know the cathartic release of hanging up on an asshole by smashing unto the phone a receiver heavy enough to bash someone’s brains.

If you’re going to insist on framing what the show extremely clearly framed as something other than simply “giving up” as merely “giving up” then I’m not sure what we’re doing here.

I used to say “stay fresh cheese bags” when leaving friends, now it’s going to be “I’m returning my damn essence to the damn fabric of the damn universe”

“Every human is a little sad knowing that they’re going to die.”