Yes truly I am a massive talent, honed through the oppression I’ve experienced as a middle class white woman. I accept this honor not for me, but for all the pumpkin spice lattes and yoga pants that bravely sacrificed themselves for my cause.

you should be in best american poetry 2015

lmao going to start publishing under the first name Ainsley

A pretender at being Chinese,

Why do people keep using their music without permission? You would think that after the first time someone got sued for it they would cut it out.
It’s actually pretty uncool to use ANYONE’S artistic property without their permission, regardless of whether they’re going to sue you for it or not.

This is the best title of any Jez post, ever.

And his boner’s been dead for six years.

The best way to end these movies would be to Shyamalan-twist them and reveal that Grey was the murderer from The Fall all along.

Jamie Dorman silently dressing himself in the mirror has some serious serial killer vibes a la his performance in the Fall. This is not sexy. It is scary. Also maybe they decided to film it before writing it because really what’s the difference? Either way, it’s going to be a badly done collection of scenes organized…

Frozen Thin Mints!!!!! Soooo good!

I'd switch #2 and #3 but yeah, you nailed it. Anyone who says Thin Mints should not be #1 is wrong and should be banned from commenting and Girl Scout Cookies.

Thin Mints are gross.