I like the way you think.

This was precisely his attitude.

Regrettably, I don’t think she had the opportunity to plan a really appropriate last meal. Arsenic mutton followed by laudanum tartlets would have been a good start, though. We are all so fond of laudanum tartlets.

I come from a long line of Jell-O salad artistes. I never touch the stuff myself but even I have to admire the skill with which they produced such marvels as the three-ringed pyramid made with green, red, and white Jell-O (the white effect being produced by the introduction of Philadelphia cream cheese); the…

Did you know poor Mrs. Beeton died of the clap? Thanks to Mr. Beeton, of course.

I work in a municipally owned building, and when it first opened, within days we had our first complaint about our (fully accessible) elevators, because the voice that tells you what floor you are approaching (“Second floor, going up”) is a female voice. A computerized female voice. Not even a real person.

Hey. At least you’re not living in Strathroy.

We’re sorry.

Believe me, I am aware of London’s less-than-stellar reputation. I’m surprised and delighted that it gave us the worthy Nazem Kadri. Normally it just gives us stuff like measles and student party-riots.

... where he was president of the Muslim Student Association in high school.

I want a tiger stripey doggo who looks both concerned and belligerent but is actually just a big baby!

He is that. And he doesn’t fart too too badly. No worse than me, at any rate ;-)

He is a total love bomb, and he thinks he is a lap dog. All 70 lbs of him.

She is elegant and adorable!

I acknowledge that I am an old and also not exactly Sharon Stone, but I’d like to know why the dog gets the most exquisite compliments when all I merit is “Look where you’re going!” or “Get outta the way!” or less complimentary comments.

I thank you for this vote of confidence!

OMG THE EARRSS

And here he is! This is Sir James Boswell Boxer-dog, aka Lord Chesterfield (because he’s always on it).

I’ll bring you out whenever I can.

That is the happiest muddiest dog I have ever seen.