Long story to preface this one.

I was at the doc when I was younger, I can’t remember the reason but I must have been bitching about my period because I was having a pelvic exam while I was on it. I heard “oh my god there is something in there,” followed by questions about whether I may have left a tampon in, which I assured them I hadn’t. They…

I had my vagina swell shut after a colposcopy and the doctor told me it was ‘psychological’ because it’s impossible to be allergic to the stuff they use. Yes I made my vagina swell shut with my mind....

“You have a bean in your ear.”

Two years ago I was living in a hotel room after a total-loss house fire, which is needless to say an enormously stressful situation. My vagina has always been very sensitive to stress. She’s a special snowflake, for sure. Additionally, my whole vagina self-care routine was disrupted by our loss. I was basically…

“I’m so very sorry, but when we were stitching you up Dr. WTF sewed his finger to your labia. It didn’t worsen the tear, but fluids mixed and we do need to do an HIV test. After we re-sew.”

In college, as a virgin and about to do the sex for the first time(!) I went to Planned Parenthood for birth control. Though she was not a doctor, the RN that attempted to examine me went on to utter the saddest thing I’ve ever heard in the 18 years since: “Oooh honey.... oh no...” she went on to comment that my hymen…

My family once had an incredibly bad run of luck. Eight months after my granny died, my aunt died of pancreatic cancer, and my mum had to miss the funeral because she had caught scarlet fever and was busy fascinating doctors in an infectious disease unit. I ended up getting strep throat from her, which then put me in…

I was seeing a new primary doc, and we were doing all the regular stuff, blood pressure and whatnot. And when he was pressing on my lower stomach it felt kinda uncomfortable, so I told him so.

my obgyn once delivered a baby that was HOLDING ONTO THE IUD THAT TRIED TO THWART IT.

A couple of friends who are ER docs have confirmed that it’s not that unusual to find things in those folds when they’re examining very big patients, things like sandwiches and remote controls.

Not gross, just embarrassing. When I was 14 or so I freaked out that I couldn’t get my tampon out, and my mum drove me to the doctors in tears to get it removed so I wouldn’t get TSS.

I very recently was in the shower and felt what seemed like, well, poop in between my cheeks. I reached back figuring I’d clean it out and pulled a worm out of my ass. Like a six inch long white worm. I screamed and threw it on the floor and it was wriggling around. My SO came running in looked at it and said “this…

Wait I had the same thing! It was a different molar but they told me they could fuse to the bone, rot, and my whole face would collapse.

18 years old. There is a bad smell and gross brown stuff leaking out of my vagina. I delve in there and feel what seems like a piece of a tampon but I can’t quite reach it. Go to the ER, terrified of TSS. The doctor takes a peek, confirms my assessment. I am a wave of shame and apologies. He laughed, picked up some…

Well, it wasn’t a doctor, but my dentist told me my wisdom teeth were basically beneath my cheekbones and there was a chance they could migrate to my eye sockets.

My friend had just given birth to her first baby, and she complained to the nurse that she was uncomfortable.

My doctor explained that boogers come from your eyes, that the lacrimal fluid goes from your eyes down into your nose through the duct on the inside corners, and it mixes with dirt and “debris” caught by your nose hairs, and that’s where boogers come from.

After having x-rays of my spine from neck to tailbone, I had an orthopedic doc say with a chuckle “Man, that must’ve been one hell of a car wreck.”

Consider the alternative that Trump really is prepping. I know his campaign “leaked” that he is not prepping, not serious, etc., but why should we believe them? When have they been honest about anything? Maybe he really has prepped. Maybe his performance at the last debate was the best he could do.