“Faparazzi”: a star-chasing jerk off.

As a Current Chicagoan Who Conveniently Forgets The Entire South and Far West Sides Exist.

I’ll add “What Problems in Chicago? I live in Wicker Park and Everything is Great Here”

I had this happen to me, but with Norplant, in 1991. Doctor put it in wrong — as in 10 days past when he was supposed to implant it. Told us to go ahead 24 hours later and so we did. Called the office every month concerned about my lack of period — no weight gain or symptoms. Doctor assured me for three months that I…

Paused reading to say Ellie Schavene was arguably not on point in this situation. She seemed perfectly polite... But she couldn't comp a single (maybe child's) waffle and have the woman try it??? It's not like it is an expensive item.

Many years ago at the group home for developmentally disabled teens where I worked there was a resident who really, really wanted to go to the best steak house in the city for his 18th birthday. He had behavior and anger issues, but was determined to earn that birthday dinner, and he managed it. So another staff…

But they didn’t fly nonstop. The couple allegedly landed in Las Vegas for a little thing I like to call...a layover.

Just like the rules of the road. When you drive an Audi YOU ARE ENTITLED TO GET IN THIS LANE NO MATTER HOW MANY CARS ARE ALREADY THERE.

God, that last one is like a Monty Python sketch. It’s ex-ice cream! It’s ice cream pining for the fjords!

I wish when I hit “dismiss” on a comment they actually would disintegrate in a puff of stench.

I think I might be one of the only film fanatics that can’t stand Greta’s acting. It makes me want to jump out of my skin.

I was in training in Wilkes-Barre, PA and was flying to my fiance’s graduation. I was worried about missing flights (I had connections) , so I got there early. I was sitting at the gate reading, and this traveling salesman walks up, sits next to me (there was literally no one else there) and says, “looks like it’s me…

That guy has Allow Me To Mansplain underpants on.

I had a boss (a biologist) who, when he had exhausted his knowledge and had to admit such, He’d say, “And now I’ve told you more than I actually know, so maybe I’ll look up the rest.”

This is so so before your time, but when I read/hear “opal”

“Maybe the right response is silence for a change...a change to come riiiight after I tell you what I think first.”

Please make this a weekly or even daily column