My boyfriend prefers a washcloth at the sink instead of a sponge (though I keep and use a sponge anyway). God only knows why. That thing gets funky almost immediately. But then, he uses the same towel post-shower every day and will for weeks on end unless/until I swap it for a clean one (how does he not realize he…

Counterpoint: they taste exactly how they should taste.

Plus, like: YES OF COURSE it counts as lying if he believes what he says. If it’s not true, it’s a lie. What a fucking dumb thing to posit.

How is it that the teenager who built a kitten-scratch-a-thin-skinned-pissboy site gets C&Ded but you call the thin-skinned pissboy a thin-skinned pissboy and you don’t get a thin-skinned pissboy babysitter coming after you? I can’t imagine it’s because you’re media and she isn’t, because clearly thin-skinned pissboy…

I’m going through this now with my boyfriend. He’s lost a bunch of weight but still wears the clothes that fit him seventy pounds ago (and looks like a homeless person in the process, yes). We went through a bunch of stuff last night, mostly pants four sizes too big that have the buttons broken off, and still he won’t…

Exactly right.

Gotta love Nintendo’s attention to detail.

Counterpoint: these are borderline terrible and the second ever limited edition flavor that I’ve thrown out before it was finished (first, obviously, was Swedish Plastic-Ass Play-doh Fish). They are like a vanilla grocery-store-bakery cookie with pink icing on top, a little bit of sugar embedded in the icing, and the…

This list is why some guys secretly (and others not-so-secretly) are glad that women in their lives buy their clothes for them. All five of these are shapeless nightmares.

This list is why some guys secretly (and others not-so-secretly) are glad that women in their lives buy their…

Our Marco’s also had a heart-shaped pizza plus their brownie dessert as a V-Day special. We had never had their thin crust, so we decided to try it. It took forever to arrive, but it was actually heart-shaped with the pepperoni appropriately spaced (and it was really good). The brownie, plus the two cookie cakes we’d…

This article is a fucking masterpiece. I love it even more than the article it’s referencing.

I only call my mom “Mother” if I’m gearing up to be really angry at her.

The cappuccino flavor was my favorite that year too. It was so satisfying.

The only one that actually made my jaw drop from surprise.

This is my favorite part of the holiday season.

I’m going to throw up. This is 2000 all over again and I’m dying to knock some smug libertarian skulls together and shout at them about history fucking repeating itself and how all evil needs to succeed is for good people to do nothing (or vote third party).

“Biff Tannen cosplayer” is killing me. I am dying. THANK YOU.

Wrynn’s death didn’t affect me at all. I was too busy mocking how goddamn cheesy that particular cinematic was.

(something something “Tiny Handser”)

I’ve had a horrible day and that legitimately cracked me up, so thank you.