Ouch, Judas.

Hes not talented enough to be as obnoxious as he is.

“I’ve never been into Phish, partly because I had a really awful roommate in college who loved them.”

That house needs more Katie Holmes.

Only write about this forever okay thanks

I think you can becuase I just did.

My mom owns me online constantly.

My 16 year old daughter died on May 29th of this year.

The dark Irish humor in me completely agrees, especially having had a mother who reveled in being the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral. (Memories of my own mother, who had been divorced from my father for a decade after a 20-year tumultuous marriage, appearing at his funeral in full black…

Fucking hell. Please no. I can’t take any more of this shit from 2016.

The fanatical, obsessive Barb love was the most confusing thing about 2016 to me.

Who, me?!

Anne Rice, when asked about the AIDS crisis:

Jennifer when the options are “spend time with new boyfriend” or “$1 million,” always choose $1 million.

You are in my brain. True story: Freshman year of college, Mr. ARay and I saw the OG movie on our first date. Strike one- He had never seen Dangerous Liasons. Yes, we were too young to see it when it came out, but that’s what VHS was for. Strike two- as we exited the the theater, he mentioned how relieved he was…

Fuck these guys. Seriously.

The thing about having kids is that you end up programmed to always feel a little sorry for people who have to distract their kids from something they don’t want them to see; even Ivanka Trump.

For some reason, I really want Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry’s relationship to last.

Durian.