But, but, that's my favorite part. If we don't get to revel in all its grim gory gruesomeness, well that's just an irresponsible waste of a perfectly good dual parent murder. Sad!

You comment sounds like you either might be viciously mocking me or snarkily agreeing with me. It's impossible to tell…

No, not just a football game. It was the football game, surpassing and eclipsing all other football games in the history of football games as well as in the history of all other games of any kind, regardless.

And "Poker Face," which is about a girl concealing from her boyfriend her lust for another girl, presumably while she's being penetrated by him. It's a song about a woman's gay lust, which could only be humiliating and utterly ego crushing to any self respecting red blooded All American bro. Ha!

Last week, you fucked around and got a triple double…

Coca Cola has been "employing" the theme of universal acceptance for a very, very long time. In 1971 they launched their massively popular and financially effective campaign which began with the TV ad of a crowd of multicolored, multi-ethnic young people atop a hill singing "I'd like to buy the world a Coke." The ad…

Gaga personally harbored an illegal immigrant Terrorist for over 7 seconds.

Depends. Up where with people?!

Bannon's Land. There, fixed twisted it even more for you.

How else would you describe that Voodoo Dark Magic that Brady conjured? He's a Satanic Sith Lord, times a zillion.

Disclaimer: No Drones were injured in the production of the spectacular halftime Gaga performance. However, immediately after the performance the drones were hacked by either Bill Belichick or precocious Russian tweens, and throughout the 3rd and 4th quarters the nefariously controlled drone swarm descended upon the…

She certainly made a bold, clear statement, but her statement—culturally and socially speaking—isn't nearly as controversial or inflammatory as Dylan's performance, or even Gaye's. Well, it won't be controversial until Fox News does their demented shitty best to condemn Gaga's performance as an unconscionably…

And I'm sure the Right will notice, just as soon as it's all indignantly and spastically explained to them by a FOX News chatterhead, just as soon as that Fox dolt has it explained to her or him by a more aware, less ignorant Fox producer. I'm assuming, of course, that some FOX News producers have to be at least…

Her sexyspectacular entrance made me shoot web juice all over my party platter of savory snacks. Excelsior!

Jaz drive?! Aw, you had it good. I had to transfer 6 years of Zip drives to digital media. Zip is the poor puny retarded cousin of Jaz.

Oh, of course. How silly of me.

But what if Trump actually is no worse than Obama? Don't laugh. What if Trump is actually better than Obama, and better than any other President in the last 75 years?! Stay with me here. What if in 50 or 100 years bewildered history buffs will be marveling at just how unfairly demonized and denigrated and dismissed…

Go on…

I was more or less neutral on Vanesa—I liked her performances well enough—until I saw her Jennifer Aniston impersonation, which is absolutely brilliant and so original and unique, and that made me fall in love with her. Silly reason, but there it is.

Forgetting women is part of his charm. Remember how he ditched Melania when they arrived at the White House? She had to walk around the back of the SUV and up the steps all alone holding that Tiffany's box like she was a hired hand. He's already shopping around for wife #4, but now he'll be even more grotesquely older…