Um, how many times was Jesus married?

Era, you mind sharing with us just exactly how you acquired your apparent expertise in identifying people who masturbate to animal-crush videos, in the dead of the night?

Fuckin Conservative Republicans and their goddamn bullshit Family Values. Cheating, Lying and Stealing: The Three Pillars of the Perfect Christian Life.

The 18 Keebler Grasshopper cookies are just kicking in, man. It's gonna be a wild ride!

Or, it's possible to imagine that Kanye's preposterously brazen act of rare and special spontaneity may have actually enshrined that otherwise fleeting and forgettable—and relatively mundane moment, if you ask me—in a uniquely memorable radiance of supernaturally brilliant media savvy genius, isn't it? Yes, yes it is.

Right?!

I have not the slightest problem with what Lena wrote—the entire Facebook post. It's accurate, succinct, and compelling. If you can do as good(ly?!) or better, please do.

Better?!… Get outta here!

I gotta say, I don't find what he did—to Taylor Swift—to be absolutely reprehensible, or moderately reprehensible, or even reprehensible at all. I found it to be slightly odd and silly, and probably symptomatic of a manic depressive personality, which is a diagnosis he has only managed to reaffirm for me through his…

Genius is and always has been a relative term. Leonardo Da Vinci was a genius artist, scientist, inventor and remarkable visionary whose miraculous creations so profoundly and thoroughly resonate within the deepest, most intimate recesses of the human soul. And Kanye is a genius at getting himself noticed. See, it's…

Yeah, if Kanye fucked Kanye I'm sure Kanye would make Kanye promise to not tell anybody that Kanye fucked Kanye. Kanye would want Kanye to keep dat shit On the Down-low.

That right there is the Crux of the Biscuit: unchecked self obsession. It also happens to be a too common personal weakness afflicting waaaaaaay too many people today who imagine themselves the Pop Superstars of their own Facebook-SnapChat-Tweet-Tumblr-Youtube Video Drama where their every insignificant action and…

Just 'cause most folks might behave improper and wrong don't mean it's right or proper to do it. "Everyone's doing it" just ain't no defense fer bein' a complete an' total worthless sunnuva bitch prick bastard. Fact is, it's all the more reason fer a fellow to consider just how harmful and useless is that way of…

I personally am currently in possession of more than one (1+), possibly three (3!) TDK brand high density CrO² recordable blank cassette tapes whose stated total length is an astonishing, seemingly impossible 110 minutes—that's an impressively massive 55 minutes per side—I shit you not. And besides, I would never shit…

Fatphobia and fat shaming are a tricky and perhaps too complex and conflicted issue for me to pretend to have any valuable or worthwhile advice for combatting, but I can attest to the power of having someone who once made me feel so uncomfortable and insecure simply because that person was heavier than the "average"…

I enjoy podcasts only while I'm doing my regular routine everyday chores around the house and usually only if the topic of the podcast is relevant to the precise chore I'm doing at that moment, so as you can imagine I'm pretty much exclusively a listener of podcasts discussing the art and sport of marathon…

Chris Hayes is a true left wing liberal crusader who grew up in a family of liberal activists and community organizers and who has not only continued in that noble and worthwhile tradition of direct social action but has also been gifted with a superior facility for well crafted and compelling editorial writing. He's…

Yes, that is the crux of the biscuit, that given the opportunity and the proper impetus people will and often do behave self destructively, very often knowingly. Biting your nose to spite your own face is an epidemic level affliction plaguing humanity all through history. The self sacrificing gesture is perhaps a…

Because the referendum initially and always was a ridiculously fucking stupid option which was rendered viable only because Cameron, himself, shamelessly and probably needlessly exploited it for his own personal political gain. That's the source and focus of John Oliver's and many other people's anger and righteous…

No, it's unbridled materialism and all of it's insidious, nefarious, sinister manifestations which is the true villain, but if you criticize our society for embracing a morbidly flawed materialistic philosophy you're branded an extreme fanatical radical terrorist traitor—you're Un-American!