Hey, as long as your toaster can accommodate, the thing to do is put both pieces of bread back to back IN THE SAME SLOT. This way, the outside gets nice and crispy while the inside stays warm and pillow-soft, just like me.

If you ever found yourself in Secaucus, you’d do the same thing.

Be warned: the Webster game does require you to set your apartment on fire.

Ugh, math!

This is the standard, regular relationship. A weird relationship would be wearing Nutella instead of, say, a shirt.

Hopefully we’ll FINALLY get to learn how Jar Jar crashed der bosses heyblibber.

Is there any other kind?

The pink candle represents the “Like” button.

Now why would anyone put pineapple ON pizza? Just do the normal thing where you dunk a pineapple slice in tomato sauce, lay a Kraft single on top, and there you go: pizza. Keep it simple, I says.

I’ll never watch it, but I’m still gonna pronounce it “nine-jickle.” Forever.

Wait a minute......there’s a Crocodile Dundee I ?????

Radium poisoning. It’s the only explanation that makes sense.

You should try enabling Batman and going with a hot dip galvanize.

IIRC, Lady Jaye and Shipwreck were still conjoined twins at this point, prior to the surgery episode.

Just like my new product: Sweet Ride! It’s gasoline....with sugar added! What could go wrong?

Man, think how much better the internet would be if every “star” or “upvote” or “like” actually sent that person candy.

Man, think how much better the internet would be if every “star” or “upvote” or “like” actually sent that person…

If you anticipate being in a Monopoly Junior mood, I recommend sourcing a copy of “Calamityville”; same general principle, but with a gold rush/prospecting theme and a plastic donkey that launches its hind legs at your opponent’s properties in an effort to knock them down.

Uncredited Bellhop: A Dead Heat on a Merry-Go-Round Story

It’s fun to stare at the letters until they lose all symbolic meaning as letters, and then see what you see!

It’s called “The Stilted Jaywalk” and it involves a piece of coiled wire, a washboard, at least half of a complete set of 1978 Topps baseball cards, an old Thermos, a new Thermos, and an oversized trenchcoat. Quite a thing to see in action.