What will those TW exacutrves think of next?

S'mores: a thing I'll think I'll like, but then don't! Every time! A lot of times!

The first object I can remember owning as a toddler was a stuffed Spider-man with velcro patches on his hands and feet.

Don't worry about it. Stick to the plan. Don't forget extra ketchup.

"List of things you'll watch at home next year, as you continue to wait for your child to be old enough to go to the movies with you"

Hidden in the leg of that bed frame is a roll of microfilm. Decode the microfilm, and follow its every instruction. Meet at the usual location. Bring french fries.

The fridge is the one that makes the clicky sound, and then the flame shoots up, right?

I liked He-Man as a kid and saw E.T. when it was first in theaters. Can't anybody tell me who or what I am?

Fingers crossed that the movie features 47 solid unexplained minutes of Darkhawk vs. Sleepwalker…

I tried to mix Purplesaurus Rex powder with milk once.

A lot of elbow grease, I shall tell you! And not in the metaphorical sense, either—I am CONSTANTLY having to re-moisturize my elbows just to keep up with demand!

Still pissed that they discontinued Mountain Berry Punch. Do you know what it takes to get decent juice from a mountain berry these days?

Was that the one with Justine Batman, or Jason Batman?

It's also a client!

If I don't get a Fun Dip mention in here, I won't be able to live with myself.

And vice versa, as a double feature, and then they make a movie about the making of those movies with Cate Blanchett playing every role.

Don't talk about her like that!

FAKE NEWTS

I think you're thinking of "American Pie."

…we suppose you can do worse than HeatWave Doritos.