It’s only beautiful if that Giraffe was married by a legitimate priest before the eyes of God. Otherwise she’s a trollop showing her goodies.

I love using her quote from the SNL Super Sweet 16 skit:

Less visits to the mound.

Fox Sports Live was great! It was too funny and smart for FS1. Why can’t we have good things?

Filling the Bowl with Deuces

Let’s see who loves that dog when her drug test comes back.

If he would have stopped running then maybe Spider-Man wouldn’t have attacked him. Spider-Man doesn’t like to profile but if it acts like a Doctor Octopus then...

Man, those jerks with ruptured spleens have all the luck.

On that last catch that should have won the game for them the defender was directly in front of Jones the whole time. He was covered! Yet he was still able to focus on the ball, catch it and drag his toes. He deserves better.

Are we sure they’re real?

Now everyone is starting to sound like Trump. They hear a half concept from a friend who heard it from another friend and now it’s a fact.

Here in the Bay Area, Greg Papa is always talking about how Don Nelson has all night poker games in Hawaii with Willie Nelson in attendance. I’m pretty sure he’s not supporting them just “in spirit”.

Current player he is most similar to: Mandingo.

Sounds like a plot synopsis for every episode of Three’s Company.

It’s pronounced CH’-EYE-NAH!

Just a little shuckin’... or was it jivin’? Which one’s the good one?

He’s definitely turned off the writers who insist Hall of Famers have a chin.

It’s the next best thing to incarcerating your rapist.

Bob Myers, general manager of the Warriors, told a great story about how clueless Klay Thompson can be sometimes. During Thompson’s rookie year the Warriors had a 2 point lead, the ball and less than 24 seconds on the clock. So of course in that situation you run out the clock. Well Thompson takes a shot and gave the…