Exactly what action are you going to take if this “monitoring device” tells you something is amiss?

No, they don’t.

No.

The Ocho!

No.

I’ll take the minivan, thanks.

I’m guessing the real reason for these is adults who have lost their driving licesenses due to drunk driving convictions.

No.

This just in: Oprah is the worst.

“accident”

Ummmmmmm... Engines aren’t “changed” every time a car hops.

No.

It no longer works this way.

It no longer works this way.

“Lowest common denominator” isn’t a compliment.

“Lowest common denominator” isn’t a compliment.

Buy this.

I have the weirdest boner.

Meh, sad sack making poor financial decisions isn’t cotd of any day, imho.

Jesus, dude.

You went on Fox of your own free will. Twice. Karma’s a bitch.

Yeah, he’s not going to quit.