I was actually really into a guy a few years ago, until I discovered not only did he have a large amount of student loan debt and a poorly-paid job (no shame in either of those, on their own, or even together)—the thing that made me lose respect/desire for him was his crazy spending habits—he would routinely do things…

Kimberly,

Reminder-

She’s clearly trying to use this to get more attention, but there is such a thing as bad press, and I hope she’s shamed into apologizing. Sacred regalia are not play things! They are not costumes, and they hold deep cultural value to to an actual, living, breathing culture and people!

I read about a woman who took out well over $100k in loans for a degree in musical theater. I just don’t get it. The odds of rising to a level that would pay off that debt is miniscule.

Happiest male’s new wife is not in the labor force and also they have no children. Does that happen anymore? Honestly the only women I know who aren’t in the workforce are those who are working their asses off taking care of their kids. What does someone with no caregiving responsibilities and no work obligations do?…

2010 Law grad here, it actually took me four years (when I opened my own practice) to find a job as a lawyer. I moved to another state after law school, which in my experience, made it more difficult.

Seconding the Aveeno recommendation! I have fairly sensitive skin, but I’ve never had a single problem using it. It’s non-greasy, light, and absorbs into the skin pretty fast. It also doesn’t give me a sort of faint, washed-out look like some other moisturizers with SPF do.

Depends on type of debt. Earning capacity is only small part of picture. Earning desire is the important component of the scenario. If one has great earning capacity but no desire to do what it takes with said capacity. Point is moot.

But it’s not really our fault that student loans aren’t dischargable in the event of bankruptcy. It used to be, just like any other form of debt. John Oliver covers it pretty well here.

Right on. Debt schmedt in my opinion (as long as it’s a reasonable debt like students loans, and no one is delinquent!). Income is always the key, although credit score is the other big fucking to-do. You have to be open about your finances with your partner from the get go, and in private you must manage them as well…

Suze Ormond, and many, many, many financial experts recommend setting up yours, theirs, and ours bank accounts, not for shady reasons but because it helps prevent things like overdraft. Co-mingling bank accounts as the default extends to when one partner worked and one did not. This is no longer true.

It’s a little depressing to see people just ruling out large swathes of the potential partner population over money. It seems to me that it’s hard enough to meet someone who you share a deep emotional and physical connection without throwing in more dealbreakers. It’s only money. In the United States and most…

Agreed. I will graduate with close to 200k in debt but will also have a good earning potential, it’s very likely that whoever I marry would too. Student loan debt that’s logical gets a pass, I can understand 200K for an engineering degree but paying 50K for a private school education that gives you a degree with no…

That makes good sense. Otherwise, NOPE; not until it get's straightened out (or on the road to that). Having to go without just basic shit can, itself, ruin a relationship).

I was thinking the same thing. When my partner got together with me I had a mountain of student debt but I was also just starting the job that all that debt was for and it’s a good paying, hopefully stable job. So how does that wash in this thinkpiece?

Yeah, it wouldn’t be about the amount of debt to me but about the hows and whys of that debt’s accumulation. Is it something from their past that they’re now paying down and can afford to pay down, and they’re not accumulating any irresponsible new debt (credit card/useless degrees/etc. as opposed to useful…

Totally. Earning capacity and also attitude towards the debt are important. I graduated with 16k and thanks to two AmeriCorps years, only had 5k to pay off and did that within 2 years after being done with AmeriCorps. But my husband has only ever had low-wage hourly jobs and has like 50k in debt and as this…

Medical debt gets a pass completely. I think the reason why I’m more forgiving of student debt is that most of the people I deal with irl have been to college and HAD to take on loans to do so. Whereas credit card debt (to me personally) might indicate crazy shopping habits which I’m wary of.

Well, if she did have scarring from recently cutting herself and was crying and acting depressed, they should have been keeping an eye on her. If the signs of her being suicidal were so obvious to the police, and they did nothing to prevent her suicide, then they are at fault.