“...listen to CRANK SOME TUNEZ. I’m talkin’ Cheap Trick, ELO, maybe even a little Steppenwolf.”

I hope that name triggered an automatic visit from Child Protective Services.

Even though I’m a Caps fan, I have to give the Pens credit...they play really well for a bunch of ex-cons and degenerate gamblers.

I knew someone at USDA who used to complain about what a giant pain in the ass the animal ID program was to implement because goat farmers didn’t want to admit how many goats they actually owned because they like to sell them “off the books” to avoid taxes.

As a Caps fan, I resemble that remark.

I love diesel almost as much as I love wagons.

Sometimes when I’m feeling a little down I remind myself that Mars is populated by alien robots and I feel better.

A buddy of mine in high school had a Spitfire that looked exactly like the one in the photos. He wasn’t much of a mechanic so it pretty much sat in the driveway while he got rides with people who didn’t drive aging British roadsters.

You should see what they drive in Nova Scotia.

What is it with Greenwood and explosions?

Narconon is really dangerous and responsible for a number of deaths. I hope you finish your book!

Oddly enough, he’s also a Scientologist.

Co$ really, really screwed up when they pissed her off.

They’re hemorrhaging members so fast that it almost seems that the church leadership is trying to deliberately drive them away. But the organization has at about a billion in cash and a few billion more in real estate holdings...so they’ll probably be around for a while.

He probably was the guy who was vomiting into the dumpster outside your apartment.

I was just mentioning that to someone. The headlines on this case have been pretty terrible.

So this is the year for the Caps? Right? Right? Goddamit...probably not.

It’s naturally sourced horsepoop for the discriminating woo-fancier to throw money at.

I had an ‘85 900 Turbo sedan (black with tan interior) in college. I still miss that car.

I eat poutine every time I go to my friendly neighborhood hockey bar.