I love wearing a mask with my sunglasses and a hat. I feel powerful and anonymous at the same time.  I haven’t smiled in months and that makes me happy.

Cheating takes planning. It’s more than just going for a walk and accidentally falling onto someone’s genitals. The thought has to enter your mind, you have to meet someone willing to have sex with you, find a place to have sex, actually have sex, put your clothes back on and return home with a plausible story for…

He has that  “I’ll just pray away the evil spirit and we’re all good” vibe. 

I have to say that I’m absolutely shocked that someone who molested underage girls and got away with it is now facing child porn charges. It must have come as a complete shock out of the blue to his enabling POS family. After all he did cry crocodile tears and was forgiven. What more can you ask for? 

Her Amazon packages for the next 10 years should be booted onto her roof. 

Of course he had to win. Who wants bragging rights that they beat a 4 year old? Do you want to go down in history as the A-hole Josh who took out a 4 year old Josh with a pool noodle? That young Josh came to kick ass and take names, all of named Josh.

Sean Penn’s amazing spirit of giving and love for other humans in need.

The local store puts out the discounted meats on Saturday morning at opening. I’ve fought with seniors over 50% off chicken breasts. Take that, Edna, those breasts are mine!

I can proudly say that one time I went to Costco to buy a cheesecake for a work function and left with only the cheesecake.  And the cheesecakes were at the very back of the store. 

Best bet would be to withdraw it in cash and head to Mexico. That much cash can keep you hidden in a small village for a long time if you are conservative with your spending.

Years ago our bank deposited $1,000.00 in our checking account. My ex moved it to a savings account and waited for the bank to notice and ask for it back. They never did and so after one year he spent it and the interest it made. This was back in the early 80s when interest rates were around 14%. I kept my fingers off…

Years ago our bank deposited $1,000.00 in our checking account. My ex moved it to a savings account and waited for the bank to notice and ask for it back. They never did and so after one year he spent it and the interest it made. This was back in the early 80s when interest rates were around 14%. I kept my fingers off…

She’s real!  She just lives in Canada!

Having your wedding at Mar a Lago

He’s like the shitty ex-roommate who invites himself to your gatherings who can’t take the hint that he’s not welcome and finally leaves when the good beer runs out.

Great, Canadian here, I got the AZ after my doctor assured me it was safe for my age early 60s. Currently still stroke free but its only been 2 weeks.

We have bright yellow and blue bandaids at work so that if you do lose it, it’s easy to spot.  

Half of a wasp. Pointed it out the the server and got a shrug.  A long blond hair in a breakfast sandwich, I got $10 in coupons and an apology.  

I paid for business class instead of economy for my first overseas flight. I’m a nervous flyer and the extra space and attention was worth the price. The seat was comfortable enough to recline and sleep in, the food was excellent. It was Air France back in 2004 so things may have changed since but it was a delightful…

It sounds like a shitty life hack.  Pay for economy and sneak into First Class for a free upgrade. It’s like people who don’t pay the extra for a window or aisle seat and then have the expectation that someone who did pay for the seat will switch with them so they can sit next to their partner. No thanks.