Check out the body language. I get more warmth from my parking meter.

The blonde woman is pissing herself laughing.

You look freaking delicious.

“And my husband said that I could have one” I stopped reading at this point.

But how will I know which side of the toast to put the avocado on?

Apparently he refuses to catch mice that are in front of him, fights with the cat next door, sleeps where ever he pleases and shows visiting dignitaries his butt. In other words, my dream cat.

I used to live in our nation’s capitol and left for a smaller city some years ago. There is no way I can afford to live and work there now even though I could get a job tomorrow. My quality of life is higher and my living costs are much lower in my “low-status” city.

The first moon landing and walk. The video was so grainy that all the lights were out in the living room to see the TV better and my best friend made out in the dark with the guy I had a crush on.

and the TV remote

Movie was very good. Judi Dench was great, bitter, angry, smart, lonely, desperate all in one.

Daniel Craig’s dick?

Just genetics for me and sure as shit not living life the right way. I used to slather on oil and baste in the sun like a turkey. I don’t advertise my age because of the hostile reaction I get sometimes. One co-worker stopped speaking to me when she found out we were the same age. I didn’t choose my DNA or whatever…

It’s all luck of the genetic draw. Of all the sisters in my family, I got the baby face like my mother. Two of my nieces have it. Everyone else looks their age. One sister is in her 50s without a single grey hair. My greys started in my 30s.

Most people didn’t know how to react either. I had to yell at him, he’d put it back and jump down acting offended.

My sibling was a user and now clean for about 2 years. I still don’t believe 90% of what she has to say about anything.

I wore a pair to a wedding, they lasted through the ceremony because I was sitting. While walking to the hotel they went South. It wasn’t the sexy look that I wanted, knee high grandma pantyhose. I threw them in the trash as soon as I got to the reception.

My best cat used to sit on the couch next to visitors and slowly show them his little pencil dick. While staring at them.

The dog is thinking, “Third time this week, this shit is getting old, Buffy”

Please don’t google monkey and frog getting busy. You will not be happy.

Man driving a Hummer; sorry about your small dick.