YET! “Yet” is the key word.

I’m sorry but my brain is now broken at the idea of chips and queso being made with mozzerella chesse.

“So, your table stopped me and asked what kind of fish they had was because they thought you were lying to them; I told them it was cod and they asked why we didn’t have real fish.”

She was dangling from that cliff provocatively.

The irony of this situation is that soooo many women, including myself, have said something similar to coddle the feelings of some hoser and avoid possible violence. Most women know this feeling. You hedge your bets, coddle, try to stay safe. It’s a lifestyle, really.

I really hate to be flippant, but this is how I pictured Swem the whole time #Donald

As a former porn star and five time Ultimate Smackdown wrestling champion, President Camacho is infinitely more qualified than any of the Republican candidates...

The amount of people that have no idea how the US government works on a basic level (and when I mean basic I mean simplified to a degree to make it accessible to school children) is frightening. You still, STILL, here people make all sorts of claims about how President Obama is going to do this. And that's exactly how…

Also also worth noting, there isn’t even a muslim candidate running for President!

Well sure, he didn’t turn the government over to the pope and that’s why he was taken down by the Papal Assasination Squad. That doesn’t make it any better.

Once in a while he shows us that he’s got more spine than so many of his colleagues on the right.

Amateur. I get my cervix scrapped for charity.

I probably would have understood that better if not for my stupid ladybrain.

Shit, I coulda been the most successful hooker of all time! Paid at both ends, so to speak!

To every person foolish enough to say, “They thought it was a bomb. Imagine if it were your kid, how would you feel?” I am quick to respond, “I’d feel pretty pissed that the people who felt certain enough it was a bomb to remove the kid didn’t likewise call in a bomb squad or evacuate the school.”

You're talking about Texas: they already castrated the curriculum.

Yes, Bristol, you’re absolutely right. The police who dragged a 14-year-old out of school in handcuffs for building a science project and subjected him to hours of racist interrogation without allowing him access to a lawyer or his parents are the real victims here. The police and white people everywhere. Can’t put…

“You should feel good about yourself! But not too good. Feel a little bad about yourself, too, or the boys won’t like you and the girls will think you’re a bitch.”

Yep, they have binders full of women.

yeah lets put someone who took a vow of poverty on some MONEY amiright