In line at the grocery this morning, I saw the new issue of People magazine. I audibly “tsked”. The man in line in front of me turned and nodded. His young daughter announced “WE voted for Hillary!” Her dad prodded, “And why?” The child answered “Because she’s smart and nice, and he’s dumb and stupid.” So these two…

Understood, but I suspect it was an older man who’s fatherly instincts kicked in when he saw the woman chained up in a cage and just said what was in his mind. Not saying it’s right OR wrong, just saying, I can sort of understand his point as well as your annoyance.

So glad the eagle came back to try and finish the job

When I was in 6th grade, our school banned shorts for some reason. I got so mad I started to campaign to bring them back.

I would too. Like really and truly I would. The older I become, the more I ‘get’ non-traditional relationships.

So what if he is? There are a lot of sexless marriages out there. And if you’re going to have a sexless marriage, have one with an adorable gay man.

I would have rather to have a gay husband who were my best friend and eat all the stuff I cook without complaining that my shitty ex-husband from real life.

Ina Garten is responsible for the single greatest tomato soup in my arsenal. She can do no wrong. http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/ina-garten/roasted-tomato-basil-soup-recipe.html

Every year people talk about how scary Sorcia McNasty’s truck story was and every year all I can think is, “Seriously?” That story was soooo over-the-top that it was not scary to me even one bit.

Yeah that was the one I had pegged as a fake. No one gets assigned a paper over winter break from college in a foreign language class. End of semester=end of assignments.

When I was kid, we had the same problem with 911 calling the house saying there was a call and hangup. It was always preceded by the phone ringing, someone picking up, and hearing a quick hangup.

That one was scary. I was also really partial to the story about the woman who was sleeping in her pickup truck camper (which couldn’t be locked from the inside!) in the woods in the middle of nowhere in a national park, and the other car that drove up and parked next to them in the middle of the night. Aaaaagh, I’m…

Fuck that shit. Drive to the police station and run inside!

OMGGG NEVER LEAD SOMEONE TO YOUR HOUSE JFC

That was an excellent selection. Although I wish it was one entry longer because the one about the guy on the Craigslist date with the guy who worked real estate and was making noises in the basement was terrifying. I thought about that story for DAYS after I read it. Scary as hell.

Am I allowed to have a second submission? This story was relayed to me by one of my best friends. Back in the late 70s, my friend’s mom was a student at UNC. She had a car on campus, and went home on the weekends fairly regularly. She lived in the country, so when she went home, her route was often unmarked pavements…

So ur with ur honey and yur making out wen the phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is “wut r u doing wit my daughter?” U tell ur girl n she say “my dad is ded”. THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

Re: 911 calls; this happened to a friend of mine once and after about seven police visits to her house, it was discovered that her phone line was just really old and created static “noise” on the line that sometimes would coalesce into 9-1-1 (kind of like in the dialup modem days if you had a noisy line sometimes it…

Oh man that reminds me of a story my dad always used to keep me and my sister from wandering around in the woods behind our farm at night. (As if we would?? We were not adventurous kids…)