Your dog is wearing a muzzle, which undermines your argument that they're good around kids.

I'm 100% sure he knew what she meant. Feigned ignorance for the humor.

You cracked the code, Sherlock.

A smart child would not constrain their wants to that little list. I want $1000, I need a pony, I would wear a Rolex, and I would read the instructions to the Powerwheels Santa's bringing me.

It couldn't be worse than Lady Gaga's stupid special with the Muppets.

Target carries it!

How do you solve a problem like NBC?

She looks like a character in Final Fantasy in that promo pic. Holy Uncanny Valley.

A+

Shout out for the Mrs. Meyer's holiday line of products. The orange clove and Iowa pine candles are HEAVENLY. Space too small for a tree? Buy the Iowa pine stuff.

I hope he chokes on his dentures.

I think you should demand that they submit to a piss test before they get their free turkey dinner.

No horror stories because my family is happy and functional, even the extended family, but my dad died a couple months ago, and so this is the first Major Holiday Without Dad. No more fried or smoked turkeys. No more expertly selected wines. No more mandatory football on TV. Just an empty chair at one end of the table.

My loungewear: underpants, t-shirt, blanket.

Copper IUDs are known to cause heavy periods, which is why I opted for Mirena.

Vanessa's response is so perfect and mature. Let's hope she goes to a school that respects her and her decisions.

Mostly, except for plastic coated paper.

We've given my mom Fallingwater and the Guggenheim. She loves them. She keeps them on her desk at work and gets lots of compliments.

Thank you!

Thank you!