Lately I’ve heard in interviews, podcasts, etc. about how weird the daily routine is for an NBA player, and how times that would be outrageously late for a normal person are not as crazy for them. Basically they’re doing the biggest part of their jobs between 7pm and 10pm, as opposed to a 9 to 5. Hearing that makes…

Did Chelsea ever get told to eat more “por que te estas enflacando”, and then have an extra scoop of beans heaped on her plate without her asking for it before she could protest?

Remember that time I kept getting told I had pneumonia and my back pain was “unrelated” and we don’t know what’s causing it, but take some Aleve we guess, and then I was diagnosed with STAGE IV CANCER? hahahahahahahafuckyoudoctors

This will almost certainly put him at odds with former teammate and notorious crip Wes Welker.

Are we ruling out the possibility that he’s secretly sworn to the Dallas Cowboys, though?

What would be even worse is if Tom Hardy gets the Oscar.

I don’t know how to take a review that doesn’t end in a nonsensical letter grade. I’m giving this movie a B for bears.

I think we know what’s happening up there.

I miss my Sassy subscription.

What are you even talking about?

This is unacceptable by Carolina. Trash-talk is fine, but once the baseball bats are introduced it becomes a blatant act of WAR.

I love love loved her parents. That line particularly made me crack up.

Regardless of the rest of the whole thing, Jackie’s father was awesome.

Alrighty. I feel the same way about murder. People frown upon murder but ya know what-I'm going to do me.

I thought Alyssa was Kris Jenner for a sec...honey, no.

Every perfect team always has that one loss.

The cake chocolate is a lie. Hell, Hershey’s uses rotten milk in their bars. It’s all terrible. Merry Christmas!

I haven’t seen a bigger asshole since Goatse

Dear ‘85 Bears,