You missed a boner.

Gwyneth Paltrow hosted a dinner party in which everyone was given their own vagina egg.

But can he see the butthole?

Barrrrrrrf. I am a loud and proud feminist who will always be fiercely protective of a woman’s right to have whatever kind of lovemaking(BARF) she wants and needs but personally, goddamnit, take me to Pound Town.

Imagine Matt McGorry without the charisma:

The Tenderman posts on Jezebel using his real name.

I’m a graduate (PhD) of an Ivy League where over 60% of the student body participates in Greek life. It was disgusting on so many levels. I had students who admitted outright that they weren’t able to study everyday because of their duties as pledges. They thought they would get more career opportunities down the line…

That is a totally bullshit NDA.

I want to support women in films, especially in lead roles, especially in non-traditional roles, for instance, as action stars.

James Bond wears a tuxedo in almost every Bond movie. He also checks into every hotel under his real name. Is that either practical or logical? No, it isn’t, but it is part of the allure. Same with the boots and the sex scene in Atomic Blonde.

Surely more:

The Trump boys look like a failed cloning experiment done in jars that someone didn’t sanitize properly.

Then you can wake up to Pence’s America, aka Gilead, the sequel. Fun! Unless he goes down too, and we get Ryan.

Police: “Freeze!”

Suggesting an alternative place to eat for somebody who isn’t comfortable isn’t weird. Assuming they aren’t comfortable because they aren’t as educated as you and telling that to the country is weird.

It’s complicated for those guys.

RN here: I’ve seen quite a few people literally do that exact thing—Walk into the ER, say “I’m trying to quit drinking and I’ll go into DTs.” They get admitted, get sedation, and hopefully come out the other side a week or so later. It’s not easy, but please don’t be ashamed of doing it that way if yoy want to detox!

Does this make you feel better? Make you feel righteous? The man is dead.

Yeah, the headline should read: I Love Big TDs Has Reason to Feel Vindicated Today