“God bless you for not screaming at me” is our country’s new slogan.

She’s always been that type of woman who “doesn’t have any girlfriends, all my friends are guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Color me not shocked.

He can’t ever play anyone but himself on screen. It’s very Führerstrating.

:)

I can just envision them saying “hey, lets do this massive bag of shrooms and go down in the catacombs! It’ll be cool!”

We want our lifeguards to have their eyes on the ocean, as the safety of our swimmers is their first priority.

The problem is that a Trump is a pile of shit, not a piece of shit.

The only way this should have gotten rebooted is if this is all just a hoax, and when you finally go in to the theaters, Tom Cruise discovers the mummy is actually Brendan Fraiser, and then when Tom Cruise asks him how he got there, he says “Let me explain,” and then the 1999 film starts playing, and you watch that…

Come on. Not a comment on attractiveness, but my favorite floral hatted, begloved, pearl clutching Sen. Graham probably says both “Lordy” and “thundercunt” multiple times a day. You just know that dude doesn’t hold back when you get a few drinks in him.

Question about exceeding tall men with tiny penis. Is it actually small or is it normal sized but on a giant, it looks small?

A grown man who exclaims “Lordy” like a floral hatted, begloved, pearl clutching church lady will never be hot to me. I tend to prefer men who can keep up with me in the swearing department.

He shoulda worn seersucker.

I don’t think he’s particularly attractive, but he’s shaking up our horrific national shit show and I reckon he’s hung like a pedestal table.

6' 8" means he’s packin if you smell what I’m stepping in...

You guys are so easily played. He clearly accomplished his goal of tying in Clinton to the Russian witch hunt because of her unsecure emails on the server that maybe one of them says something about Benghazi, and where is the plane? Pretty suspicious. Makes you think.

I don’t like the ageism in some of the speculation about McCain’s terrible question. Let’s remember his was the last question at the end of a very long hearing. I was tired and frazzled too (and still in my PJs, looking like absolute shit). I think what’s important here is less how capable McCain’s mind is, but how…

Retire, old man, you’re fucking useless. You can cluck your dessicated tongue and wag your bony finger at Trump’s antics all you want, but you don’t actually do a goddamn thing about it.

This is all a plot by the Republicans to make it appear that Trump isn’t the most senile person in Washington DC.

You need to use a wet towel not a pillow.