When you are not the smartest person in a conversation with Antonio Cromartie, you need to get your shit together.

Bengals fan- Steve Smith Sr. is one of the NFL’s last interesting characters, and his remaining years in the league should be treasured as he is a reminder that not every NFL superstar needs to be a perfectly manicured corporate brand machine. That said, FUCKING SCOREBOARD, YOU SHIT EATING PRICK. ENJOY RIDING OUT YOUR…

or perhaps in prison?

Hmmm, but to complete the picture, where would New England’s shits be?

Because Boston fans are delusional, perpetually aggrieved loons.

In related news, the Vatican Cinnabon franchise, PapalBon, has seen a 60% increase in web traffic.

Somewhere Ryan Fitzpatrick’s son is thinking:

“The Bills have shits in the stands covered, and Miami’s edging us out in shits on the field, so we better up our game in the locker room”

/AFC East’d

If any amateur lip-readers out there can figure out what Smith thought of Nelson, we’d love to know.

You’re the Cleveland Browns of Deadspin commenting

Did you decide to be the worst when you woke up this morning?

I’m sorry but people just wouldn’t be as interested in the ads if the players were compensated for their image. The amateurism is what sets the ads apart.

It’s not even the ads that bigger me as much as the promotion on every network show. It’s bonkers. CBS Thursday was giving the ideal players with their prices on the damn pregame?! Espn and nfl network giving whole segments for it now? It’s ludicrously out of hand and in poor taste by being in bed with these companies…

What a horrible human being she is. Scum for doing that. It would be one thing to fuck up the investigation. It’s another to ruthlessly do that to the mom of the dead child, which the police officers are, in part, responsible for.

I think we all need a palate cleanser after that one ...

Are we really going to believe what the officers have to say about this?

That’s an excellent point. You are absolutely correct.

So, correction: No one should feel safe around police. Not a one.

“That was so cruel.”

That’s exactly why it was done.

Police in this country are absolutely no longer worthy of anyone’s respect and should be regarded with suspicion at all times. They are NOT here to help you. Full Stop. They will fuck you over in a second if they think it can either further their careers, sooth their…

Why send that card back with her new promotion? That was so cruel.

The most horrifying, and also the most heart breaking section, lies at the end: