I’m holding out hope. I think she’ll prevail.

I desperately want the suits Pima was wearing at the end of Mad Men, and mostly because of the vest + tie combo. Swoon. I have a trial coming up, and THAT’s the shit I want to wear to court, baby.

I had to read The Feminine Mystique for a grad school class on women’s history, I borrowed / stole a copy from my then-girlfriend. It was the Georgia O’Keefe copy, full of my GF’s high school baby lesbian feminist angry marginalia about “the patriarchy.” I will cherish that copy forever, it feels like such an…

If you elect me to office, I promise to personally shove a slice of Meat-Love Supreme pizza down the throat of every American man, woman, and child.

Eh, I was yelled at for being “Un- American” when I was questioning Bush back in those days!

Are you me?

I was in college, but doing the same thing. Loved me some Djarums.

So Kristen Stewart is....Taken?

Drake sucks. I’m not sure if that’s a hot take or an unoriginal take. But it’s true. Drake sucks.

I wouldn’t call that woman back either.

My mom is like this in a different way. She expects me to give her details about my sex life and when I didn't she threw a huge temper tantrum and called a psychologist. I'm 20. And the psychologist sided with her.

You don’t have to go off the hormones! I get horrible periods and could only deal with it through hormones and HELL NO if I was going to go back to that.

Well it starts when your period is latte...

I want to drink a bottle of this while watching the First Wives Club more than anything right now.

i am pro *chilled* red wine & also sometimes CALIMOCHOOOOO (red wine + coca cola)

Their senators and congressmen?

“Hank, do not just stand there watching Dale mow a chicken. Get your cheeks down off that line and get yourself back in that race!”

Dang it, as if having impossibly narrow urethras wasn’t bad enough.