Can we just get him to play Mother's Milk in the movie version of The Boys?

When the 1990-1996 writing staff of The Simpsons comes for The AV Club, we'll have nothing left to say.

Remember when Don Johnson got stopped by customs with EIGHT BILLION DOLLARS on him? You'd think that would've been bigger news.

Well, we agree on the lazy part.

Also: Dr. Bloom's wardrobe has leveled up. She now looks like she's one of the X-men.

In 2019 when Jai Courtney stars in the solo Shatterstar movie, Gambit is going to look like a Harold Pinter play.

Wait. Is this an episode of Talkin' Spanish?

Hoobastank.

Smash Mouth.

You're right. I fucked that up.

Duke started playing Magic at age 5, but in college, he was faced with a choice:

With Jon Stewart looking to get back to where it all began, it was either stand-up or sitting on a black leather sofa, in a black leather jacket, obsequiously asking Blind Melon about their new album.

Bravo!

I guess this means NBC passed on my all-white remake of the The Wiz.

"Teenagers, I came here to fill you with exactly two things: piss and vinegar. And I'm all out of vinegar."

The writer of this pilot, Richard Day, is now a writer for Dog with A Blog as well as something called Girls Will Be Girls: The Jizz Party.

Though the scene where Jim's Dad helps Chris Kyle through his PTSD by telling him about that one time he mistakenly gunned down all of those women in Vietnam was not only hilarious, but the kind of sincere, bravura film acting that should've garnered Eugene Levy a Best Supporting Actor nomination.

Fucking spellcheck.

I wonder if the stroke parallelized his child-beating arm.

Loyal readers knew it was a fake pull quote the moment Mongrel Media implied our esteemed Mr. Dowd was capable of experiencing any kind of human enjoyment. A tragic 2011 screening of Madea's Big Happy Family left him permanently incapable of any smile greater than a 3 degree upturned arc, known in the medical…