Here comes the Best Picture envelope....and it’s Shape of Water! But NOT SO FAST YUGI, because that envelope also contains my Trap Card: Nefarious Accountant! It steals all the votes from the winning movie and gives them to another randomly selected 2017 film!

So congratulations to The Bye Bye Man for winning Best…

That take is very, very hot.

Exactly zero people are surprised as Coco wins for Best Animated Feature. Viewers check their watches as all 970 animators file in to give speeches...WHAT’S THIS? A MASKED ASSAILANT JUST HIT THE DIRECTOR WITH A STEEL CHAIR WHILE THE REFEREE WAS DISTRACTED! IT’S THE PRODUCER OF BOSS BABY AND HE’S STEALING THE BEST…

Well, that, and a whole shitload of ocean.

Geez Spidey what do you have against Flash, he’s your biggest fan.

I’m just going to put this out there:

I don’t think the Soul Stone is in Wakanda. I think it will be missing until the third act of Avengers 4, after Thanos has collected all of the other Infinity Stones, and the Avengers are scrambling to find the last one before he can. At some point, Tony Stark will freak out, screaming, “If it’s not in Wakanda, where…

This is the best one.

The ABBA ‘Gimme gimme gimme’ version is the best version:

I thought they meant this parentage:

In France, a wizard is called a “royale with cheese”

All disgusting things aside, was that the Song of Storms?

Only if you ignore that Rotten Tomatoes ALSO averages critic reviews like Metacritic except without the proprietary weighing system.

Howard has altered the tone. Pray he does not alter it further.

Twitter just topped Oscorp for most evil company in the world.

Apple better fucking fix this or I am going to keep buying their products anyway.

We call 3,4,5 the Swedish trilogy. In the first, a powerful Knight falls to darkness and murders his friends and his wife before being defeated and cast into flames. In the second film he tortures his daughter and assists in the murder of a planet. In the third one, he beats and berates his son, then demands he join…

I expect to see this take a lot, and I expect to keep disagreeing with it. Yes this movie was a little bolder than The Force Awakens. It painstakingly subverted some expectations throughout. But it killed exactly one main character from the original trilogy, just like its predecessor (and he faded into Force oblivion…

Since I’m still in the Star Wars mood and in particular with the prequel memes I like to imagine that last statement with this picture in mind.

What gets cut open and crawled inside this time?