Dear Japan, South Korea:

Diamond engagement ring. Remember studying all the variables (don’t remember one thing about ‘em and not worth googling) that applies to a quality diamond. Now with two kids and a mortgage, look at that thing and think, “wonder if I can get low 6 figures for that useless symbol.”

I will write here today only because I want you to be able to tell your folks during the holiday break that you managed to get 1 comment on your recent chess article on deadspin.

Under the NFL concussion protocol, he’s totally fine.

“Many of these tests were inconclusive.” WINNAH!

Blah blah. Five minutes before the presser ...

Arnold Schwarzenegger voice: “You’ve been cancelled.”

Guy’s never lost to Rafa (2-0 career!) but has all of 49 career ATP wins at age 31. Ridiculous talent and a joy to watch, win or (more often) lose. Shame he’s yet to play Fed.

That’s a classic, hey-I’m-already-down-40-0-in-this-game-to-a-nobody-who’s-taking-me-to-a-third-set-what-happened-to-my-career-I-was-once-somebody shot-making from Almags.

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Sky’s the limit for the kid but he’s already played 62 matches this year (23 tournaments) and his team should be more selective to be wary of the tour grind in the future. 2017 should be interesting - he’ll be on everyone’s radar and no one will overlook him in the draw. He wouldn’t be the first prodigy to have a…

Golf clap for being creative, but I’m sure there are contingencies tied to sustained employment? I mean, if you leave the company 18 months from signing date on good terms (just found a better gig), I’m pretty sure Axon won’t deliver a Model 3. So it’s not really a signing bonus? I’ve worked at companies that referred…

Alexander Zverez (Germany) also had a nice weekend, winning his first ATP title over Stan Wawrinka - coming back from a break down in the third set. Also beat Berdych in the semis. Guy’s only 19 and #24 in the world (a bit behind Pouille) - as anyone that age and rank, a bit inconsistent - he’s beaten Stan and Fed…

Not to defend the guy but the Browns recovered the gift-from-the-gods fumble on the 27-yard line with 20 seconds left ... and their one subsequent play was to have the QB down the ball a couple yards back to wind down the clock? Considering the kicker had missed from 41, 42 but made from 38, 46, and 48, maybe try to…

Could be singing an entirely different tune in a week. Not a Giants fan but they’re 5 back to the Dodgers but have Bumgarner, Cueto, and Moore going up against Kershaw, Hill, and Maeda. Then 4 games vs. a Padres team headed for high 90s losses. Then next week, play at home vs. Colorado and LA (3 each). Don’t believe…

Yeah, but we have a guy who flies into a bunch of birds and then becomes a national hero/celebrity/best-selling author.

You’re joking, right? Past contestants include Kardashian, The Sitch, Snooki, Warren Sapp, Bristol Palin, Hope Solo, Paula Deen, etc. Lochte is a PERFECT choice for all the right and wrong reasons.

Blind draws are stupid but what the hey, everyone knew the process (and risks of a bad draw) going in. Burroughs also got blown out in his next match (losing 11-1) ... sucks for a guy who was 129-2 in his international career going 1-2 in what was supposed to be his Burroughs Brand party. As always, maybe all the…

So a 24-yo gal who was 2015 world champion and ranked #1 in the world at 55kg drops down to 53kg and beats a 33-yo gal ... and that’s some kind of grand upset? Yoshida is legendary but the term is associated with competitors who are aging and getting past their prime. Seems like that’s what happened here. An aging,…

To be that guy, I’ve watched some form of MMA/UFC since the mid 1990s ... and I hate what the UFC has become SO MUCH.