To be fair, Miami fans got burned big time by Wayne Huizenga after the ‘97 Series. That would have been a very exciting team to watch make an attempt to repeat. Fool me once, shame on you...

The Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer changed my life.

I think everyone was just thankful that this idiot on the field was at least wearing clothes.

Steve Delabar does NOT play the game the right way.

I saw a pair of those guys flying overhead in Flamingo, FL about 10 or 12 years ago. They were absolutely beautiful.

I think that more closely resembles a puffin.

Any list that doesn’t have the Magnificent Frigate bird as #1 is shit. Look it up, those things are great.

I have a decidedly different use for washcloths in my house, but they are, admittedly, dipped in chloroform. Oh, wait—- that’s other people’s houses.

Here’s Bautista after the punch:

Damned if I don’t think of that lyric every time I hear about Anthony Mason. RIP Yauch.

Rangers fan here. I’ve been wanting to get this off my chest, so thank you for the opportunity. This Rangers team just wasn’t built for the playoffs. I mean, on paper it made sense, but I was never a big fan of the Boyle signing, and... dare I say it? Lundqvist is starting to look old.

Hey, two wrongs don’t make a right.

Whenever I get audited by the IRS, the first thing I do is fire them.

Mr. Putin! I didn’t know you Kinja’ed! We coulda been hangin out!

Feefa gonna feef.

It was actually a Porsche, but we always saw things through Calvin’s eyes, and to Calvin, his lame dad drove a lame car. (P.S. His dad was a sports executive, and sold quaaludes on the side.)

Logic fail.

Uber drivers don’t stick their crotch on my junk. Hopefully. Usually.

It’s not his fault; he’s a Latin player, and can’t be expected to know the rules in the United States. Plus, people are out to get him.

Imagine how steamed she’s going to be when she find out about Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr.