That's terrifying. The only factor that could make this not threatening is that he would have had to park his douche-mobile before he physically assaulted you.

Why do you think he took so long dragging that stupid cross where he needed to go? So many hotties on the ancient sidewalks, he had to keep stopping to collect their phone numbers for their ancient sin-phones.

I sort of remember Sean and Robin filed for divorce, then reconciled, then filed again and went through with it. He just seems like a really bad guy. Why am I even thinking about this?

Did Robin Wright file any charges against him? I remember when he was with Madonna he did some seriously nasty shit with her.

Here's a photo of my own sweet pups in the car to express how much my heart is warmed.

I will buy the Traveling Pants only if I can have a Sisterhood to go with them. Actually, I will buy more than one pair, if it means I can be part of the Sisterhood but not have to share the Pants.

I missed this homework assignment... the one where we are supposed to take a really horrific, sad situation, and fill in as many imaginary details as we can in order to make it even more awful, and thus somehow feel better about it because those nasty people got what they deserved!

I scored a total zero on the above. However, I can blog about how to consolidate your car trash (like candy wrappers, empty cigarette cartons, etc), find additional space to hang clothing (answer- everywhere! Window frames, doorways, over closet doors, and so forth), how to launder and repair vintage lingerie, how to…

Not surprised they used to use these in photo shoots, probably until photoshop/ retouching became perfected. It sort of makes sense they'd use this item in pageants, where it seems the goal to have the women look as much like dolls as possible.

(whispering) I don't think it's sarcasm...I think this is the dick-pic guy, and he's trying to communicate with Dodai. She wasn't clear with him!

I would set up that friend of yours on a date with a girl I know... she very matter-of-factly told me that Hepatitis C turns into AIDS. Or maybe HPV. She wasn't sure.

2 stories that are right next to each other on the side of my page here: Woman spends $30,000 to look like Kim Kardashian, is now in extreme debt, and This rainbow loom dress can be yours for a mere $290,000. I guess it's comparatively cheap to look like Kim Kardashian... maybe they didn't need a rainbow loom to…

I'm sorry I mistook your post for stand-up. Creative writing?

You know, this is a serious issue we're talking about. It's not cool to practice your stand-up routine here. Wait for open-mic night.

Also, she believe the supermarket somehow has the power to tell the food SUPPLIER to change their packaging. Oh, right... I forgot that all food sold in the supermarkets is actually from the supermarket farms out in the back of the supermarket. This is exactly the kind of woman I'd get stuck behind on line at a…

WiLL Made It??? Is he related to Cousin It?

Of course, my nose will eventually fall off too, and when it does, how will I smell?

I'm over 40 and they already did; I'm typing with my nose. Mad skillz, yo.

Him sitting on that fucking bench and boring people with his life story reminds me of the parts in Airplane! when the main character is forever telling his seat mate about his romance with Julie Haggerty. When they cut back to present day w/the two of them on the airplane the seat mate is in the process of committing…

Not only do I hate this movie with a burning passion, I will never forgive the hollywood contingent for awarding this movie the Best Picture Oscar over Pulp Fiction, which I think everyone can agree was way more groundbreaking and influential than this box of bullshit. Not since Dances with Wolves and Kevin Costner's…