Help me out — which pixel is Jack McDowell?

"most unlikely box score in baseball history"

Actually, 36% of NYC residents are transplants. From other countries. There may also be some transplants from elsewhere in the US, I'm not sure. But you're right, probably no one from Boston.

Are you sure J.A. Happ pitched in that inning? Because the Toronto bullpen looked pretty damn happless.

In the dad's defense, it could be a long time before anyone on the Marlins hits a double again.

WTF does this post have to do with Prince Fielder?

What's your excuse now, Cy Young?

Emily Idaho! I Loved watching that show on Disney when I was a kid.

I'm so glad I have Deadspin to alert me when other sports media, like ESPN, tries to create a news story out of nothing. Silly ESPN with its silly non-stories!

Satan was pushing for a Death Valley campus, but Phoenix was his second choice.

Wait, I'm supposed to be upset that some of the basketball TV dollars are supporting non-revenue sports? Please clarify; I'm having trouble adjusting my indignation-levels to the Sports on Earth quote.

Oh come on, what do you think, he's a professional writer or something?

"That's why the rules for being a Deadspin commenter are fairly simple. First, be funny. Second, do not not be funny."

This. Because a few hours ago, Deadspin posted video of an obscure hockey player being paralyzed so we could make jokes about it.

+1, creative.

A fairly attractive 40-year-old woman is referred to as an "old person", and I'm reminded that this is Gizmodo, where a 2-year-old phone is considered obsolete.

"these fans really understand the nuisances of the game"

Good point. He beat cancer, and then while on PEDs, he beat all the other riders on PEDs to win one of the most physically demanding competitions in the world. Several times. This remains an amazing story.

Armstrong, Tom Green, and... wait, where's the John Kruk post? Someone at Deadspin dropped the ball.

Not to nitpick, but Gary Myers really wrote only 5 words in that paragraph.