Replying to edit: I know that none of the proffered plot is at all feasible but wouldn't it be lovely if it was?

I just want an action movie where Lara Croft and Storm team up and end up making out together in the end with a bunch of buildings blowing up in the background, is that so goddamned hard?

Sheer beauty.

Ashton Cooper's a woman, as you'd know if you read the one sentence bio right above the discuss button. No clue if she's queer or not, though. As a lesbian, the film just seems appalling, but your anger at this particular writer is rooted in a fallacy.

No, I'm sorry, where are these hordes of lesbians and queer women saying "YES! Blue-haired white twentysomething waifes having ridiculously clinical sex are a perfect reflection of who we as a community are! My God, why did no one ever think of this before!" "The best sex I've ever seen on screen" from one lesbian is…

It affects the way you breathe, not your lung capacity. If no one tells you how to properly breathe in one, it can seem daunting, but you can get just enough air. I walk/flit/run around my university campus in one every day. Believe me, I'd pass out if I couldn't breathe.

Look, as someone who has worn several different kinds of corsets as well (and what do you mean "if they have boning?" Steel boning partially defines what is a true corset), including conical overbusts. If you can sing opera in it - and I have, though not in a conical-ribcaged corset - you can breathe in it. You just…

If she's wearing a corset, it doesn't affect her breathing unless it's the rare conical-ribcage overbust. Your lungs are not in your waist.

It sincerely worries me that this is the first thing you jump to.

Not only is she eloquent and gorgeous and an amazing actor, but her earrings are fucking fabulous too. This woman is aaaamaaaazing.

Wait... you've never had your hair pulled or pulled someone else's? It really isn't that uncommon. I think you're envisioning like a yanking motion on the ends of the hair rather than getting a fistful of hair very, very close to your partner's roots.

YES. That bothered me so much!

Actually, with me, I think it's the well-fitting suits. I am also a fan of Robert Downey Junior for the same reason. Elba and Downey always have lovely, properly-fitting suits. Always. With the rest of Hollywood it's like the motherfuckers don't have a tailor.

There are gay women who find this gentleman (AND HIS RESUME I MEAN MY GOD HE'S BEEN GREAT IN SOME GREAT PRODUCTIONS) stunning. I would know, I am one.

Talk. Constantly. Talk until your jaw unhinges itself. Even then, make an effort, just so God doesn't perchance think you've reneged on your chatty ways.

Is not the goal of dating for fundamentalist Christians to MAKE it last? Preferably the first time around and without any premarital Eskimo kissing?

I will pray for you.

Au contraire. I hate that anyone has to go through this, but better intelligent, articulate kids who can think for themselves than impressionable, credulous kids who will absorb this stuff without question - that's how you end up with more Lookadouches.

God says that women should shut up if they want boyfriends.

THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT.