You are a beautiful, sparkly, well-informed unicorn!

I flat out told my husband that voting is non negotiable if we want to stay married. We have mail in ballots so there's absolutely no excuse.

I'm not under 30 and I did vote, but yeah.

I feel like a goddamn unicorn. I'm under 30 and I didn't just vote, I also researched all the candidates (even for the local school board) and for both ballot measures.

Wait, you're saying that because I'm 34 I don't count as young anymore? damn you erin!

"I understand fiscal Republicans..."

That's okay, I hear you're on his non-celebrity hall pass list so all is right in the world.

also seriously tho look at justin's hair

THIS IS A FUCKING EXCELLENT DIRTBAG EVERYTHING IMPORTANT IS IN IT I AM SO EXCITE ABOUT HARRY I AM IN A CONSTANT STATE OF HEAVY BREATHING AND THEN TAYLOR IS AMAZING AND THEN WHAT THE FUCK IS JTIMB'S HAIR IN THAT PICTURE

Ahh Ryan Lochte. Dumb as rocks, but his face sure is pretty.

She looks like Billy Corgan now. Everyone with bleached or shaved eyebrows looks like Billy Corgan to me.

Which is weird, because I just googled him and apparently Billy Corgan actually does have eyebrows. Huh. My world is all topsy-turvy.

but our sons and daughters are priceless

You know what will make you feel better? Premarital, slutty sex.

I would vote for someone named Talizabeth Goodpussy. No question.

I'm glad people are proud of voting, because I just went in there uninformed and left feeling like I should have done fifteen minutes of research. Half the questions were stuff I knew nothing about and left blank, like "Should Talizabeth Goodpussy stay on the Utah Supreme Court?" It never ever occurred to me that Utah…

Mine doesn't rhyme, but I like plain ol' Keep Your Church Out Of My Cunt.

Zombie socialist hippie Jew.

They're always having 5 for $25 sales and have tons of styles and cuts and colors - basic cotton, lace, whatever. Plus they're very comfortable and last for a long time!

I pretty much feel elderly walking into any store that plays music now. I feel weird knowing that the most comfortable stores for me these days are the ones that are quiet and have lots of couches for me to plop down on.

No, I'm just obsessed with their underwear. (Less obsessed with the decibel level of the music that plays in their stores, which always makes me feel too elderly to be shopping there.)